‘Survivor: Tocantins’ Episode 12 Recap: The Final Forza!

Previously on ‘Survivor’: The bride of the Dragon Slayer, the fair Deb, turned against the wise and powerful Dragon Slayer. So, with his trusted Wizard by his side, he banished her to the nether realm known as “The Jury.”

This Week: Coach is injured, Erinn is intense, Probst is interrupted, and the final four is set!

39 Days, 16 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

Here’s the tribe as it currently stands.

Forza (wearing green)

•    Coach (The Dragon Slayer) – 37 – Soccer Coach
•    Erinn – 26 – Hairstylist
•    JT – 24 – Cattle Rancher
•    Taj – 37 – Former Pop Star
•    Stephen (The Wizard) – 29 – Corporate Consultant

Back from Tribal Council and JT and Stephen are smartly explaining to Coach that the reason they turned on Deb was because she was turning on Coach. Coach falls for it hook, line, and sinker and thinks they were trying to protect him. However, Coach is smart enough to know that he has no control over the game.

The following morning, Coach is trying to stay away from Exile. He claims his asthma is really starting to get to him. He thinks the noble thing to do is to send a male, but isn’t above sending Taj or Erinn.

Reward Challenge Time: The players will be shackled at the ankles and have to race through a maze that’s shaped like the “Survivor” logo. Once they’re through they’ll have to build a pole. With that pole they’ll have to retrieve a bag. With that bag they’ll have to knock over three targets. The winner will be taken to the Governor’s retreat and enjoy a feast, a shower, and a comfy bed.

JT and Coach make it through the maze first and start building their pole. Probst calls the action, saying “JT is going to work on his pole.”

Grow up.

JT manages to complete his pole first, retrieve his bag, and knock over his targets before anyone can mount a serious challenge. JT chooses Stephen to join him on the reward. JT then chooses to send Coach to Exile by brilliantly saying, “Let’s be noble, Coach.” Playing into Coach’s beliefs is soooo smart.

Coach says he’s not going to eat while he’s there, he’s just going to meditate. For no good reason, Erinn goes off on him, saying he’s trying to be a martyr. That’s just a stupid move.

Coach says he doesn’t mind who throws stones at him. He even goes so far as to say, “Hit me with your best shot, Pat Benatar.” And with that, Coach is off to spend time with the “Shadows of the Night.”

At Exile, Coach lets us know that he’s “Unbreakable, unbending, unyielding, immeasurable, unmovable, and invincible.” Kurt Angle thinks he left out “Intensity, integrity, and intelligence.” Yes, I’m aware only 2% of the people reading this will get that.

At the reward, JT makes a beeline for the shower. While he’s in there, he tells us that he hasn’t “Washed his nasty tail.” And, you’re welcome for that visual.

At dinner, Stephen and JT share their plan to go to the final two together. Good plan for JT, not so good for Stephen.

Immunity Challenge Time: Coach arrives at the challenge, having not eaten for the past few days. Can’t say I understand this strategy. But, in all fairness, he has carved himself a sweet Dragon Slayer cane.

For the challenge, the players will have to brace themselves between two large planks. Every fifteen minutes, they’ll have to move to a smaller set of foot holds. The last person standing will receive immunity.

Erinn is the first person out, and is followed shortly by Stephen and Taj. Probst smells another Emmy in the air and sells the moment saying, “The listener and the talker, the young buck and the older warrior…battling it out for a spot in the final four.”

Goosebumps in the Holmes House, well done.

JT offers to step down in exchange for food, but Probst has none to offer. Oh sure, but when Heidi and Jenna from the Amazon offer to get naked in exchange for peanut butter he manages to find some. I see where his priorities are.

The battle rages on with Coach eventually dropping out, but not before letting out a mighty warrior’s scream. Coach collapses, claiming his back has been having spasms. Coach refuses medical attention because he thinks they’d force him to leave the game. Fortunately, he has his Dragon Slayer cane to help him back to camp.

Back at camp, Coach channels King Leonidas from “300” by explaining his glorious defeat at the hands of the worthy JT. Afterwards, Stephen tells Coach that they’ll be voting Erinn out at Tribal Council

That night at Tribal Council, Coach continues to wow the jury by quoting Mark Twain and making borderline sexist comments.

Fun Fact: There are, in fact, women on the jury.

Probst digs into his bag of awesome “Survivor” catchphrases, saying “It is time to vote.” But Coach interrupts him to recite a poem.


And another thing: last week Taj is grabbing Probst, now Coach is interrupting Probst…these things are simply not done, people. A little respect, please.

Voting Time: JT votes for Erinn, Erinn votes for Coach (saying “Dragon slayed”), Taj votes for Coach, Coach votes for Erinn, and Stephen’s vote is secret.

One vote for Coach, a vote for Erinn, a second vote for Erinn, a second vote for Coach, and the fifth member of the jury is…

Sorry to interrupt, I’d like to take a second to recite a poem of my own (in haiku form).

Oh, Dragon Slayer.
With your awesome walking stick.
Thank you for playing.

Verdict: My Christmas wish was to see Coach in front of the jury. But, it wasn’t meant to be. Something that’s sticking with me is, JT didn’t have to vote for Coach, so now he’ll probably still have Coach’s vote. I thought Stephen would be smarter then to allow that to happen. Oh well, if Stephen doesn’t get rid of JT soon, it won’t matter.

Oh, and let the nickname record show that in his final statement, Coach changed Stephen’s nickname to “The Evil Wizard.”

Who’s Going to Win? Taj is still my girl. If Stephen can boot JT, she could beat Stephen in a vote.

What Do You Think? Who’s going to win this mess? Can anyone stop JT? Does Erinn think before she talks?

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