‘Survivor: H.V.V’ Episode 5 Recap: The King Gets a Dragon Slayer

Last Week: Coach wept over things Sandra said, Sandra crept over to where Russell was searching for the immunity idol, and JT leapt over to Tom and Colby’s side and booted Cirie in the process.

39 Days, 20 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

Here are the tribes as they currently stand…

The Hero Tribe (wearing blue)

Rupert Boneham – 45
James Clement – 32
Colby Donaldson – 35
Amanda Kimmel – 24
James “JT” Thomas Jr. – 25
Tom Westman – 45
Candice Woodcock – 27

The Villain Tribe
(wearing red)

Tyson Apostol – 30
Sandra Diaz-Twine – 34
Danielle DiLorenzo – 28
Russell Hantz – 37
Jerri Manthey – 38
“Boston” Rob Mariano – 33
Parvati Shallow – 27
Benjamin “Coach” Wade – 38
Courtney Yates – 28

We start up with the Heroes returning to camp after tribal council. Colby lets us know that JT is a real American hero, just like G.I. Joe.

JT tells everyone that the vote wasn’t personal and that he was just trying to make the tribe stronger. Rupert and his toe don’t buy that explanation for a second.

The following morning, the Villains are found on the beach participating in some “Dragon-Slayer Chi.” His words, not mine. True to form, Coach takes it very seriously. Courtney and Sandra do not.

Everyone participates except for Russell. Russell is busy practicing his Find-the-Idol Chi. And true to form, he finally finds the hidden immunity idol.

Reward Challenge: Schmergen Brawl is back, baby! Between this and last week’s challenge, it’s like a clip show of challenges that have injured players.

In Schmergen Brawl, three players from each team will fight over balls. Once they have a ball, they’ll toss it to their teammates who are standing on platforms. Those players will then try to shoot a basket. First team to score two baskets wins a trip to Chocolate Island or something weird like that. Jerri almost bursts into flames at the mention of chocolate.

J-Pro tries to entice them with a little chocolate, but the Heroes aren’t into it, they want to rumble. Probst takes offense to them turning down his generous offer and lets them know that the challenge won’t start until he gets to say a few of his catchphrases.

Angry Probst.

The Villains will sit out Amanda, Courtney, and Parvati. Colby will sit out for the Heroes.

Round 1:
James does a very good job getting the balls to his team, but he goes down after a rebound attempt. Medical is brought in and James’s leg is in bad shape. Medical eventually pulls him out of the challenge.

Play starts back up with Amanda quickly scoring for the Heroes.

Round 2: JT and Rob get into it a couple of times with neither guy gaining an advantage. Eventually Tyson scores for the bad guys.

After the play Rupert smashes Jerri face-first into the retaining wall. It didn’t look intentional, but it did look violent.

Round 3: JT smartly figures out a strategy where he can use the ball to knock the Villains’ shots out of the air. However, he can’t stop Jerri from getting to her chocolate. She hits the winning shot for the Villains.

After the challenge, Medical decides to splint James’s leg up to see if he can walk. I’m sure this is all Stephenie’s fault somehow.

Meanwhile, the Villains are having a ball at Chocolate Island. Everyone is so busy eating they didn’t notice Augustus Gloop falling into a river in the background.

After the gorging, Coach, Tyson, Boston Rob, Jerri, and Sandra discuss strategy. It looks like Russell and Parvati are going to be in a bit of trouble the next time the Villains lose immunity.

Back at chocolate central, Russell admits to Parvati that he’s found the idol. They plot to make a move to get Coach to flip.

Russell approaches Coach in an attempt to bring him into the fold. Coach is touched that Russell trusts him enough to share the idol. Coach displays this by kneeling in front of Russell. Russell responds by “knighting” Coach.

Seriously.

At the Heroes camp, Amanda points out that this could be the second time James goes home because of an injury. Then she cries and says, “If James doesn’t come back, what am I going to do?”

And…why is she on the Heroes tribe again?

Fortunately for Amanda,  James limps his way back into camp. And fortunately for us, we don’t have to listen to her cry anymore.

Candice is less emotional about the injury, noting that James should be the next to go if they lose immunity.

Immunity Challenge: One person from each team will call out orders. The other players will be blindfolded. The blindfolded players will have to retrieve ten puzzle pieces. First tribe to put their puzzle together wins immunity.

The Villains will sit out Tyson and Danielle.

Jerri calls for the Villains (flashback to Australia) while James and his leg will call for the Heroes.

Hilarity ensues as the players stumble all over the course. Rob in particular takes a nasty shot to the midsection. Eventually the Heroes win the puzzle retrieval portion but not before James loses his voice (this isn’t his week).

Unfortunately for the Heroes, their trouble with puzzles continues as the Villains manage to complete the puzzle first and win their second straight immunity challenge.

Back at the Heroes camp, the players have come to the conclusion that they’re terrible at puzzles. See, the Heroes are observant. Too bad there isn’t an observing immunity challenge.

Politicking revolves around James’s alliance wanting Tom to go home because he confuses them during challenges.

Wait…what?

Tom and his alliance want James to go because…you know…he can barely walk.

JT, in his effort to be trusted, tells both sides he’s voting for the other team’s guy. Colby sees right through this.

That night at tribal council, J-Pro tells us that his niece could beat James in a race right now. James disagrees. Wow…CBS, make this happen. James yelling at Probst’s niece would be ratings gold.

After that exchange, James accuses Tom and Candice of losing the challenge for them.

Tom thinks James is being kept around because he’s loyal to his alliance, not because he can help in challenges. Tom also thinks he’s going home unless some “good people” do the right thing.

Voting Time: Tom votes for James saying “All mass, no class” and the rest are kept secret.

At least if Tom gets voted out he can snag a sweet job writing for Hallmark.

J-Pro tallies the votes, then reads them; two votes for Tom, two votes for James, one vote for Tom, and the fifth person voted out of “Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains” is…Tom.

Verdict: Wow, voting out Tom while they’re getting killed in challenges seems like a really bad move. JT and James’s alliance could have voted out Candice and kept their numbers if they were determined to keep James around. That being said, the season has been very entertaining so far.  I can’t wait until we get to see the Villains finally throw down.

Who’s Going to Win?
I’m going to stick with Jerri. I’m thinking she goes where the Dragon Slayer goes. And he’s in a good spot right now.

Power Rankings Update: “Survivor: Vanuatu’s” Scout Cloud Lee didn’t do the All-Star team any favors. She had Tom in the first position while I had him in the eleventh spot. That makes the current score All-Stars 25, Team Gordon 54. Who’ll step up for the All-Stars next? Bobby Jon Drinkard from “Survivor: Palau” and “Survivor: Guatemala.” I can’t blow a big lead two seasons in a row…right?

More “Survivor” Fun: I had a chance to ask a bunch of former and current players who their picks are for the Biggest Hero in “Survivor” History. Also, don’t miss Fancast’s exclusive commentary from “Survivor: The Amazon” winner Jenna Morasca.

Note: “Survivor” will be preempted by basketball next week. So, the Power Rankings will return on Tuesday, March 23.

Stupid basketball…

What Do You Think? Can Russell trust Coach? Should the Heroes have picked Tom over James? Are “Survivor” challenges getting too violent?

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