Help for the Fashion Challenged

I’m a big believer in experimenting with your look. That’s why I didn’t cut my hair for a year and a half.

Note: Actually, I’ve never cut my hair, but you know what I’m talking about.

Another Note: I’m the guy to the left in that picture. The guy on the right doesn’t have to worry about his hair at all. (But he does have a sweet Web series).

I always assumed I would let it grow until I was sick of it or until the alliance partner put her foot down. Oddly enough, that day never came. Despite how gross it was in the hot Nicaraguan sun, what a pain it was to dry, or how much it drove my frenemy Kerry nuts I still kinda liked it.

Yet Another Note: Truthfully, I loved how much Kerry hated it.

Why’d I finally lose it? For AIDS Delaware, a group of people who are trying to punch stupid AIDS in its stupid AIDS face.

OK, so maybe that’s not their exact mission statement, but you have to admit it’s catchy.

How does a haircut help fight AIDS? Good question. For some odd reason, these good people have asked me to host their Red Ribbon Runway Fashion Show. This is an annual event where the area’s finest fashion and hairstyle houses (is that the right term?) come together to highlight the latest trends in fashion.

Why’d AIDS Delaware choose me? I am very passionate about AIDS prevention and helping those with AIDS, but other than that, I have no idea. As anyone who’s seen me running around town in promotional “Survivor” baseball caps or my “Human Target” hoodie can attest, I’m far from fashionable. Seriously, I have as much business hosting a fashion show as Lady Gaga has hosting a subtlety contest.

Ya know…if subtlety contests existed.

Moving on.

So, not being one to let a total lack of qualifications stop me from doing anything, I ran out and got myself an adult haircut. Not only that, local fashion house Mystique hooked me up with a super sweet suit complete with a bad-ass leather tie.

Fun Fact: Leather ties are beyond hard to tie.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Gordon, how can I see this awesome new haircut.” I’ll tell you. If you live in the Delaware area, you can buy a ticket to this Saturday’s event and come out and support this worthy cause.

If you don’t live in the area, you can still make a donation.

And if you still need convincing, here’s a sneak peek at the cufflinks I’ll be wearing…


2 Responses to “Help for the Fashion Challenged”

  1. jim Says:

    Hey Holmes, sorry I’ll be missing your hosting responsibilities. Hope you have a great night!

  2. janet Says:

    i know a marine who will happily help you
    with a “high and tight”

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