‘Survivor: Cagayan’ Episode 9 Recap: It’s Not a Lie If Your Mom Says It’s OK

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'Survivor: Cagayan' (CBS)

NOTE: XFINITY TV is the place to be for all sorts of “Survivor: Cagayan” back-stabbin’, torch-snuffin’ fun. We’ll have Power Rankings with “Blood vs. Water” competitor Ciera Eastin, every Wednesday evening we’ll bring you a recap of the most recent episode, and every Thursday you’ll be able to watch the previous night’s episode and read an interview with the eliminated contestant. Be sure to follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for immediate updates.

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Last Week: LJ’s time in the game, like his name, was abbreviated.

39 Days, 18 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

Let’s take a look at the tribe as it currently stands.

The Solarrion Tribe (wearing black)
Jefra – Miss Kentucky Teen USA, 22
Jeremiah – Model, 34
Kassandra – Attorney, 41
Latasha – Accountant, 37
Spencer – Economics Student, 21
Tony – Police Officer, 39
Trish – Pilates Trainer, 48
Woo – Martial Arts Instructor, 29

Quick Note: I’d like to thank everyone for their kind words and prayers during my family emergency last week. You guys are the best alliance ever.

Ah…good to be back home. However, Tony might not agree with me because Jefra gets all up in his business when they get home from Tribal.

But Trish understands why Tony didn’t tell her and she still trust him. Wait, what?! He tells you one thing, then does another and you still trust him?

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” Inigo Montoya to Trish

The next morning, Tony builds Spy Shack 2.0 around the water well so he can hear people strategizing.

And it works! He totally overhears Trish and Jefra talking shop!

I’m waiting for an A.C.M.E. package to arrive at tree mail addressed to the guy.

Fortunately for them, they weren’t plotting to get rid of Tony. They think the alliance is still in effect, it’s just short one handsome horse whisperer.

Reward Challenge Time: Two teams of four will race out in boats to collect paddles. Back at the beach, the players will use the paddles to solve a word puzzle. The winners will go on a field trip to a barbecue.

Kass, Trish, Tony, and Woo are the orange team, Jeremiah, Jefra, Tasha, and Spencer are the purple team. Oh man, Jefra’s going to be stuck with the underdogs no matter what.

The race gets off to an awkward start, with poor Jefra hanging off the side of a boat. But, things eventually even out.

The orange team gets back to the beach with the paddles first, but just barely.

Woo and Kass have puzzle duty for orange, while Tasha and Spencer go for purple.

Both tribes are doing some cheating, looking at each others’ puzzles and whatnot. However, the purple team manages to pull off the win.

Back at camp, Kass is cool with Tony’s move because she finds Tony annoying and would rather have him around than a threat like LJ.

Meanwhile, Tony is annoyed because Trish would rather look for food than talk about strategy. But, when Woo and Trish do find food, Woo falls out of a tree! Maybe getting Woo to fall to his death is part of her strategy! Keep an eye on her.

Fortunately, Woo says the fall only caused a “Charlie Horse in my butt.” Meanwhile in Delaware, I call dibs on “Charlie Horse in my butt” as a band name.

At the barbecue reward, Tasha, Jeremiah, and Spencer go to work on Jefra. She agrees with them that Tony should be the next one to go.

After the meal, letters from home are delivered and Jefra loses it. And as if she was watching the season live, Jefra’s mom gives her permission to lie. Jefra takes this as a sign and makes a final four alliance with her lunchmates.

Immunity Challenge Time: Players will stand on a narrow beam while balancing a ball on a pole. As the challenge goes on they’ll move down the platform and lower their hand on the pole. Last person on the beam with their ball in place wins immunity.

Note: No, I’m not going to make ball or pole jokes. You have to go to Twitter for that.

Round One: Jefra is out first. She’s followed by Trish, Tony, and Kass.

Round Two: Jeremiah is out quickly. Everyone else makes it.

Final Round: Woo does his best, but he falls. We’re down to Tasha and Spencer.

The two battle it out, but Spencer eventually loses it. Tasha wins immunity.

Politicking around camp has Jefra, Jeremiah, Spencer, and Tasha voting for Tony and if they go to rocks, so be it. This seems like the perfect time for Spencer to bust out that idol.

Speaking of idols, Tony runs off on an idol hunt. He decides to target the iconic locations around camp. Good for him, he knows his “Survivor.” Sure enough, he finds the magic idol (complete with special magic idol music).

The rules state that the magic idol can be played after all of the votes have been read. So, basically it’s like the overpowered idol that made “Survivor: Cook Islands” so boring.

Also, the idol can only be used by the person who’s holding it. It can’t be given to someone else.

Fun Fact: Apparently movie mogul Tyler Perry is the person who came up with the idea for this overpowered idol. Huh…this idea Probst uses and yet he ignores the Holmes vs. Shallow season I’ve been pitching for years.

Back at the beach, Trish is able to see through Jefra because her poker face sucks. Jefra tells Trish how she really feels about Tony. Trish smartly reminds Jefra that she can’t beat the members of her new alliance.

Later, Tony cements a final five alliance with himself, Woo, Trish, Kass, and Jefra.

Kass then says that she thinks Spencer has an idol because she can read him. Well played.

Before Tribal, Jefra tells Jeremiah that she won’t be voting with them. Well, there goes your chance of blindsiding them.

Capitalizing on Jefra’s mistake, Spencer admits to the rest of his alliance that he has the idol. They decide to target Woo because he’s the biggest physical threat.

That night at Tribal Council, Jeremiah is finally allowed to talk. He totally says something.

Jefra says she was weighing her options and that she doesn’t think she can beat Tasha or Spencer. Ummm…or anyone else. Ever. (I added that last part.)

Spencer thinks this is foolish because Jefra is clearly on the bottom and that Tony has broken a ton of promises.

Tony says he hasn’t broken promises, he’s done things for a reason. Dude, it’s still a broken promise if you have a reason.

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” Inigo Montoya to Tony

Then, Spencer and Tasha both say they’ll vote for Tony to win because he steered the game. So smart. Well done, Brains.

Tony thinks there’s a time to make big moves and that time isn’t now.

Woo’s vote is based on who could have the immunity idol.

Jeremiah thinks Spencer is a bigger threat than he is. Spencer thinks Jeremiah is way more likable than he is. I think both big lugs are threatening and likable.

Voting Time: Spencer votes for Woo (while making fun of the way he talks) and the rest of the votes are sooper secret.

J-Pro tallies and returns. But before the votes are read, Spencer plays his idol for himself. Tony pulls out his own idol, then claims it is a fake, and says that Spencer was going to give his idol to “Jeremy” but didn’t because of the fake. OK…

Alright, we’ve got three votes for Woo, three votes for Jeremiah, and the eleventh person to be eliminated from “Survivor: Cagayan” and the fourth member of the jury is…Jeremiah.

Verdict: I don’t like the mega idol. I really hope it doesn’t mess up what has been an outstanding season of “Survivor.”

Power Rankings Results: Ciera had Jeremiah in spot six, I had him in spot five. So, the current score is Team Ciera 75, Team Gordon 81.

Who’s Going to Win? If Tony can somehow break up the Kass/Trish/Jefra alliance, it’s all his. If not, here’s hoping Trish enjoys her million.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

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