More Whatnot

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

The Rules: Each week our two combatants will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the players will earn. For example, if Kellyn is voted out this episode, Roark will receive one point and Gordon will receive two points. At the end of the season, the person with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Ghost Island” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

Last Week: Roark had Brendan in spot seventeen while Gordon him her in spot sixteen. The current score is Team Roark 24, Team Gordon 28.

Quick Note: Rankings are not based on who the player thinks is most likely to win. The smart strategy is to rank players based on how safe you think they are in the upcoming vote.

Roark’s Score: 24 Any questions for Roark? Drop her a line on Twitter: @roarkstweets	Gordon’s Score: 28 Any questions for Gordon? Drop him a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes
1. Kellyn: The second she said it was her greatest “Survivor” fear, we all knew she was pulling the white rock. From a results oriented POV – she clearly made the right call at Ghost Island. Thus, she looks smart and savvy. She’s just not going anywhere anytime soon.	1. Domenick: If Naviti ever goes to Tribal again, and with Brendan gone that’s a big “if”, Domenick will finally get to send the Noble one home.
2. Laurel: Laurel does a great job assembling her crew and pulling in who she prefers to work with. You can tell her story is ramping up, not winding down.	2. Kellyn: Losing Brendan is a big blow to Malolo’s challenge prowess. If they’re hoping to avoid Tribal, Kellyn might have to pull another puzzle rabbit out of her hat. But win or lose, Kellyn will be fine with Bradley as her shield.
3. Donathan: Donathan is seamlessly included in Laurel’s plans to form a cross-tribe alliance with Dom and Wendell. This group should be safe for a bit here.	3. Laurel: Challenge goddess…alliance queen. Five stars, highest recommendation.
4. Domenick: Dom and Wendell’s nighttime talk made me want to quote “Casablanca.” I have much faith in these two.	4. Donathan: Laurel’s right-hand man? That’s a good spot to be right now.
5. Wendell: Wendell has very flat affect and dead eyes in his conversation with Dom, whereas Dom is animated and expressive. I hope we get Wendell plays straight man to Dom’s wacky and hyper personality for a long time.	5. Wendell: This is the best I’ve felt about a winner pick in a long time. He’s low-key, people want to work with him, and he’s a sneaky challenge threat. Do it for us, Wendell!
6. Sebastian: I am furious that I will not be receiving a superlative from Sebs in his exit press. Please make up one for me, Sebs! If Michael and Brendan are helpless penguins on a tropical island, what might I be?	6. Libby: I’d be worried about you if Domenick had to play his idol blindly, but Laurel and Donathan can lead him in the right direction.
7. James: This group of Naviti members (James through Angela) had a very quiet episode. Makes me think they safe, but not much screentime to go off of in terms of guessing their position in the game.	7. James: I don’t think James will be the first target, but his move two weeks ago was like the Avengers battling back Loki and the Chitauri. It lets the universe know he’s a force to be reckoned with.
8. Libby: Libby was a centerpiece of the Morgan vote, this episode, I don’t think we even heard from her.	8. Desiree: Desiree got to talk a little strategy and she killed it. Here’s hoping we get to see more of her.
9. Angela: She has reunited with her boi Chris, but beyond that her outlook is not very bright.	9. Chelsea: Dude! You said stuff and it was super smart! High fives! Buuuuut, did the fact that you were one of the two names called out raise some eyebrows?
10. Chris: Guys, Chris likes himself. And I like him, too! Not to be friends with him, but he is very welcome on my TV. His personality will make people snap one day, though.	10. Angela: Hey.
11. Bradley: Stonewalling the minority is not even close to what Kim Spradlin would do. Bradley is safe today, but he is absolutely pissing people off, which can definitely be a problem tomorrow.	11. Seabass: Fraternizing with the enemy? That’s like finding a Sour Patch Kid in the middle of a bag of Gummi Bears. It’s going to draw attention.
12. Chelsea: She got a confessional!!	12. Bradley: I’d imagine Bradley is the kind of guy whose dark humor is hilarious when he’s on your side and infuriating when you’re against him. He’d better get control of that considering potential jurors will be against him at some point.
13. Desiree: Des is technically the person to suggest Brenden as the boot. Still not convinced about her presence on this show.	13. Jenna: A few people on Twitter have floated the theory to me that the classic Naviti players on Malolo might have been freaked by Morgan getting the boot and started throwing challenges. I’m not sure that’s what we’re seeing, but it would make sense to me.
14. Jenna: Kind of obsessed with her strategy of just using five pieces of paper in the voting booth. Try it, girl! Change the game!	14. Michael: Michael swung for the fences last week and got picked off at the warning track. Maybe he can pull a Ben and find 100 consecutive immunity idols?
15. Stephanie: It is hard to rank these three, since they all objectively sit squarely on the bottom of this tribe. If this group loses again – it’s a toss up who goes home. They are in trouble.	15. Chris: I’ll say is again, I think Naviti is going to be tough to beat in challenges from here on. But, if they do drop one, Chris is a goner.
16. Michael: Original Navitis went with the approach of voting out a strong man to confuse the original Malolos. I doubt they’ll do it again, but if they do Michael is obviously screwed. Also idol-less. So that’s not ideal.	16. Stephanie: All of classic Malolo had to come out swinging last week if they were going to sway Seabass or Whats-her-name. It didn’t work. And now Stephanie is left with a big ol’ target on her back.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

Gordon Holmes: I know it was probably rough watching what happened last night, so I wanted to start this off with an inspirational quote that has gotten me through some tough times.
Brendan Shapiro: OK.
Holmes: Sometimes you’ve got to go with the flow because the Malolo can go no further low low than the Malolo low.
Shapiro: (Laughs) Wiser words have never been said.
Holmes: If it makes you feel any better, it’s a Brendan love fest on social media with all of the Malolo competitors.
Shapiro: Yeah, I felt like I was making pretty good relationships out there. It’s good in the game…and it’s good period. One of the things that surprised me was how much I really like everyone out there. It’s a game built on conflict, so I thought there would be more jerks. (Laughs) It’s a nice group.

Holmes: Your alliance decided that Sebastian and Chelsea were the most likely to flip. What gave you that impression?
Shapiro: What was clear was that Bradley and Kellyn were running things. After that, it was kind of like the other three were falling in line. We didn’t pick on Des as much because she was just so locked in. We didn’t feel like we had a good shot at her getting to flip. But it was definitely the Bradley and Kellyn show and they both had the attitude that they wanted to Kim Spradlin there way through the game by keeping everybody locked down and circling the wagons.
Holmes: Did you approach Sebastian and Chelsea before Tribal?
Shapiro: We kicked the idea around. But, we decided to spring it and cause confusion and chaos in the moment. Because, the reality is; we knew that if we gave them a chance to think about it, it wouldn’t make sense to go away from their five. So, we wanted to catch them in the moment and hope to panic them.

Holmes: I think you just answered my follow-up. Watching it from the safety of my couch I’m thinking, “Why would Sebastian or Chelsea flip if they’re going to be safe no matter what?” So, the thought was to scare the crap out of them and shake someone loose?
Shapiro: Yeah, and you saw in the edit that we were really picking on Sea Bass. We were hoping that he would do something foolish. But, we knew in reality that it wasn’t going to work. Our only hope was the idol, but why not give it a shot? So, we laid it on thick for a while, you only saw a quarter of the barrage against Bradley. We really lit him up. But it didn’t happen.
Holmes: Did you just call Sebastian “Sea Bass?”
Shapiro: Yeah.
Holmes: Is that name catching on?
Shapiro: Oh yeah, we all call him “Sea Bass.”
Holmes: (Laughs) I’m so glad that’s a thing.

Holmes: Bradley seemed to be rubbing the classic Malolo members the wrong way. We heard him complaining about Malolo beach…although, in his defense, Naviti beach is much nicer. Was there anything else that was getting under everyone’s skin?
Shapiro: Bradley…I think he was bent out of shape about having to change beaches, so he was complaining about everything. The reward challenge, he complained that the current was pulling toward Naviti’s pole. If there was something to complain about, he’d complain about it. And he’s got a great sense of humor. But out there, it was kind of a dark sense of humor. I will say this about him, outside of the game, we’re friends. But inside of the game I wanted to smash him, as did my fellow Malolos. He was killing us.

Holmes: Michael made the call to play the idol for Stephanie at Tribal. But what was the feeling back at camp?
Shapiro: I saw that train coming down the tracks. They’re congratulating themselves that we aren’t going to see it coming because they’re going to take a guy out. Well, I saw it coming. They were telegraphing the move. I told Michael that they were coming for one of the two of us. Then, Kellyn and I had a heart to heart about an hour or two before Tribal. And she’s such a sweet person. She wears her emotions on her sleeve. I told her the next day was my birthday, which it was, and I wanted to be playing on my birthday. And I saw a tear come to her eye. And she tried to turn away, but I still saw it. It was all the conformation I needed. So, I told Michael they were coming for me. But he had a hard time believing that they were going to come for a guy. It’s hard out there, he did the best he could. And it was hard to live it because I saw it coming.
Holmes: Did anything specific happen at Tribal to convince Michael that Stephanie was the target?
Shapiro: He just believed that it was going to be one of the two women. At Tribal they hinted that it was going to be Stephanie and he believed it. And when he did his bluff, he was gaging Bradley’s reaction. I was looking at Michael, so I don’t know how Bradley reacted. But, he must’ve seen something in Bradley that he didn’t like.

Holmes: Alright, word association time. Let’s start with Kellyn.
Shapiro: Empathetic. She said that it’s her super power, it might also be her kryptonite.
Holmes: Libby?
Shapiro: Surprisingly tough and resourceful.
Holmes: Jenna?
Shapiro: We couldn’t be in more different stations of life, yet she was as kind to me as you can imagine.
Holmes: Stephanie?
Shapiro: She’s all heart. Super courageous. Tough as they come.
Holmes: Jacob?
Shapiro: Incredibly enthusiastic. Great guy, but his enthusiasm may have gotten the best of him.
Holmes: James?
Shapiro: Great guy. Genuine, kind, thoughtful.
Holmes: Laurel?
Shapiro: We had an instant connection. She’s poised and loyal.
Holmes: Desiree?
Shapiro: The coolest person out there in a New York, music-scene kind of way. I didn’t know until last night that she was the one who threw my name out, so good for her.
Holmes: Chelsea?
Shapiro: Very reserved. I couldn’t tell if she was just hanging around or if she’s a tiger lurking in the tall grass.
Holmes: Gonzalez?
Shapiro: Polished…and dangerous. Gone before she could show her full game.
Holmes: Donathan?
Shapiro: Magnetic personality.
Holmes: Michael?
Shapiro: He is a prodigy. “Survivor” prodigy.
Holmes: Sebastian?
Shapiro: Great guy, deeper than the edit would have you believe.
Holmes: Bradley?
Shapiro: (Laughs) He’s funny…often in a dark and depressing kind of way. I don’t want to blow his cover, but he’s a good guy.

Holmes: What was your reaction when you learned that Michael was really eighteen?
Shapiro: I was shocked. He could have told me that he was 28 and I would have believed it. That’s why I call him “The Prodigy.” He’s got all the tools; physical, social, strategic. And he’s a ten out ten in all of those things. He’s really good. And, he’s also a great guy. He feels terrible about what went down. He’s reached out to me to tell me how sorry he is. He’s just a stand-up guy.
Holmes: Do you hold it over his head?
Shapiro: No. I was never mad, not for a second. He didn’t play it selfishly.
Holmes: You’re a better man than me. I would’ve tried to get a dinner out of him.
Shapiro: (Laughs) Maybe when we’re out in LA.

Holmes: What were the Malolo tribe dynamics before the swap? Who would’ve gone home if you’d lost another immunity?
Shapiro: Before the swap, we had a situation where I was good with everybody. There was an alliance of Libby, Michael, Jenna, Stephanie, and me. But, I was also in with Laurel, James, and Donathan. Michael and I were considering knocking Stephanie or Jenna out. We felt like they were dangerous and they might come for us next. We wanted to get them before they got us, so that’s probably what would have happened next. Then after the swap, instead of being at odds, we were as tight as could be.

Holmes: This is kind of dumb, but…my first memory of you is when I was hanging out with a CBS representative on interview day and you asked if you could borrow my sunblock. You were super polite and you applied it to the tops of your feet. And I’m thinking, “Man, I’d never think to apply sunblock to the top of my feet. This guy is polite, he’s regimented, he’s got it so together.”
Shapiro: (Laughs)
Holmes: And I think they did a good job portraying that. Was there anything that happened out there that you wish we’d seen?
Shapiro: My perception was they may have undersold my strategic chops. That first vote where I got called “The lion.” That was my deal, right? What didn’t make the edit was it looked like it was going to be Donathan or Gonzalez. But really it was going to be Jenna or Gonzalez. I decided at the last minute that I didn’t want to come back from Tribal with Stephanie, who was Jenna’s best friend, to come back and go all scorched earth. I wanted everyone to come back on the same page and happy. So, I changed it at the last minute. And Gonzo figured it out, to her credit. That’s why she tried to stir things up. I wish that’d made the edit, but otherwise, I can’t complain. They did me right out there.

Holmes: I have a big presentation today. Any chance I can get a pep talk out of you?
Shapiro: (Laughs) Just try hard, you’ll kill it.
Holmes: (Laughs) Short and to the point. Just know if they ever do another “Second Chance,” that you have my full support.
Shapiro: Thank you, I appreciate that. I’d do it in a heartbeat.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Last Week: Both tribes became Naviti 5, Malolo 4, Ghost Island was visited by the Noble 1, and Morgan was 86’d.

39 Days, 20 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

The tribes as they currently stand…

The Naviti Tribe (wearing purple)
Angela, 42 – Army Veteran
Chris, 27 – Male Model
Donathan, 26 – Caretaker
Domenick, 38 – Construction Supervisor
James, 24 – Business Analyst
Libby, 24 – Social Media Strategist
Laurel, 29 – Financial Consultant
Wendell, 33 – Furniture Company Owner

The Malolo Tribe (wearing orange)
Bradley, 26 – Law Student
Brendan, 41 – Physical Education Teacher
Chelsea, 24 – EMT/Professional Cheerleader
Desiree, 21 – Student
Jenna, 23 – Advertising Account Executive
Kellyn, 31 – Career Counselor
Michael, 18 – Real Estate Agent
Sebastian, 22 – Fishing Guide
Stephanie, 34 – Yoga Instructor

Post-Tribal Shenanigans

Domenick and Wendell play things cool after the blindside, but none of the Malolo originals seem interested in talking with them. And, as you’d imagine, Angela is not pleased.

The defeated duo goes for a walk where Domenick admits that he has a real idol. This rejuvenates Wendell and they plot to try to get someone from the dominant alliance to flip.

The next morning, Domenick is psyched to find the legacy advantage left behind by the mOrgan donor. (I’m not proud of that.)

Reward Challenge Time: Two members from each tribe will swim out to retrieve a ring. The first team to wrestle the ring to their post will win a point. The first tribe to three points wins milk and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Result: Naviti wins it 3 to 1 thanks, in part, to Laurel being a machine.

Ghost Island: Naviti doesn’t think they can come to a consensus, so they ask for Malolo draws rocks. Kellyn states that this is her biggest fear and then immediately is revealed as the person who pulled the white rock. Doh…

At Ghost Island

Kellyn tries to stay positive, saying that this is where the “’Survivor’ Gods” wanted her to be.

Kellyn is presented with the option to play a game for an advantage, however, to play she’ll have to wager her vote at the next Tribal. She eventually decides against it, knowing that the next Malolo vote will probably be 5-to-4.

I agree with this move. If the next vote gets screwed up, it could turn her entire alliance against her. Also, how do you know the advantage isn’t something dumb like a free screening of “Jack and Jill?”

At Naviti Beach

Chris correctly reads classic Naviti voting for Angela as a move against him. He then works with the classic Maloloans to devise a plan to split the votes between Wendell and Dom.

He punctuates this by saying, “I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you, and I like myself.”

Chris likes himself? Sorry, that joke is too easy.

Donathan and Laurel don’t love the idea of working with Chris. So, Laurel approaches Dom with the idea of teaming up. Dom understandably jumps at the chance, even admitting to having an idol. He tells Laurel, “Three is still a good number if you have tools to use them with…and I have a tool.”

Too easy!

Immunity Challenge Time: The tribes will swim out to a cage. They’ll climb over the cage and release a chest. They’ll drag the chest back to the beach and across a track. From there, they’ll have to lasso another section of the track to complete the course. Finally, the first team to toss five balls onto a beam will win immunity.

Result: Holy cow! That was the most tense challenge I’ve seen in years. Naviti was waaaaaaay behind, but Sebastian and Brendan couldn’t close the deal. Wendell and Chris were able to catch them and win. Amazing!

Pre-Tribal Politicking

Things are clearly broken down along old Tribal lines with the classic Naviti folk deciding to target Brendan because a stranger named Chelsea thinks the men will be the least likely targets and someone else named Desiree thinks nobody will suspect Brendan.

Bradley is happy to see Brendan go, because he considers him to be “a dad who gives terrible pep talks.” Burn.

Bradley also says the fact that he focuses on every possible detail will make him a fantastic lawyer. Fantastic lawyer? Clearly that’s an oxymoron.

Sea Bass chimes in saying he’s going to go with the flow “because the Malolo can go no further low low than the Malolo low.” Get this guy some Banana Laffy Taffy, he’s losing it.

Michael and Brendan realize that there are no cracks to exploit, so they decide to tell Stephanie and Jenna about the world’s biggest idol.

The plan is to show the idol, tell everyone that they’re all voting for Bradley, and hoping that either Sebastian or Chelsea flip.

Quick Aside: So…what is the motivation for Sebastian or Chelsea to flip if they know they’ll be safe no matter what?

Tribal Time

Classic Malolo immediately puts their plan into place; they start by pointing out that Bradley is in control and Chelsea and Sebastian are on the bottom.

Bradley does his best to defend himself, saying they’re an alliance of equal partners. But Stephanie chips away, congratulating him for making everyone believe that.

Then…Michael reveals his idol and claims that it’s for double immunity and will protect two people. Nobody questions him about this…which I find hard to believe.

Finally, Michael says that they’re all voting for Bradley and it’ll only take one extra vote to change the game.

Sebastian seems slightly swayed, but doesn’t commit either way.

Voting Time: Stephanie votes for Bradley and the rest of the votes are lost to the magic of editing.

During the vote, Michael tells Brendan that he thinks the vote is going toward Stephanie.

J-Pro tallies and returns. He asks if anyone wants to play an idol…and Michael does. He starts by claiming that he’ll play it for himself and Brendan, but rethinks it and plays it for Stephanie.

Alright, we’ve got four votes for Bradley, four votes for Brendan, and the fourth person voted out of “Survivor: Ghost Island” is…Brendan.

As Brendan is leaving, he hilariously gives his buddies a pep talk. Just as Bradley predicted!

Verdict: Wow! That was tense! Great challenge, great strategy, great Tribal. Amazing episode.

	Kellyn – I think she made the right call at Ghost Island. An advantage would have been cool, but losing that vote would have been a trainwreck. Laurel – You got some key information and you’re keeping your options open. Smart, smart, smart.
	Domenic and Wendell – You both kept your cool after a rough Tribal and now you’re back in the game. Michael – You made a move, and you had a 25% shot of it working. Keep your head up, you made some great points at Tribal. Donathan – You’re basically Laurel this week without the challenge domination.
	Chelsea and Sebastian – You both made the right call. You weren’t in any real danger and you’ve still got some fodder to pick off.
	Bradley – Your actions around camp got you in trouble. I think the key is to not act like you’re on top when you’re on top. Stephanie – I’m worried that your Tribal performance put a bigger target on your back.
	Chris – This Angela/Chris/Classic Malolo alliance should be a slam dunk, but people don’t want to work with you. Some self-awareness would do you wonders.
	Libby, Angela, James, Jenna, and Desiree – I can’t give you full credit if you don’t show your work.

Power Rankings Results: Roark had Brendan in spot seventeen, I had him in spot sixteen. The current score is Team Roark 24, Team Gordon 28.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

The Rules: Each week our two combatants will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the players will earn. For example, if Kellyn is voted out this episode, Roark will receive one point and Gordon will receive five points. At the end of the season, the person with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Ghost Island” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

Last Week: Roark had Morgan in spot seven while Gordon had her in spot twelve. The current score is Team Roark 7, Team Gordon 12.

Quick Note: Rankings are not based on who the player thinks is most likely to win. The smart strategy is to rank players based on how safe you think they are in the upcoming vote.

 

Roark’s Score: 7 Any questions for Roark? Drop her a line on Twitter: @roarkstweets	Gordon’s Score: 12 Any questions for Gordon? Drop him a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes
1. Kellyn: Kellyn had some funny confessionals and seemed instrumental in the puzzle again. She’s fine.	1. Domenick: Domenick is not going home with an idol in his pocket. If anything, receiving the legacy advantage will inspire him to do anything he can to stick around for as long as possible.
2. James: Good news! The lack of oxygen to his brain during the drowning did not effect his IQ as this was a truly great move by James. Angela doesn’t trust Dom and Wendell, and you got an original Naviti out. Snaps for James!	2. Donathan: After last week’s shocker, there’s no way an under-the-radar player like Donathan is going home if Malolo goes to Tribal. They’re going to be dropping bombs.
3. Laurel: Laurel did a great job of keeping the target on Morgan and off Wendell, so I assume there are some conversations we missed between Laurel and Wendell.	3. Libby: Libby’s been getting a lot of heat for not protecting Morgan, but it was probably for the best if people were aware of how close they were. Keeping her around wouldn’t have been worth the target it would put on Libby’s back.
4. Donathan: Donathan is way too big a character to be going anywhere. He wasn’t making the power moves, but he’s safely within a group and going with the flow.	4. Sebastian: A likable challenge asset who catches fish and isn’t a strategic threat? He should be safe.
5. Domenick: I see what he’s trying to do here, but I’m not sure it’s working. Time will tell. I do think both Dom and Wendell will rebound.	5. Kellyn: Vote out the Puzzle Whisperer? No way.
6. Wendell: Wendell and Dom were left out in the cold on this one. Or in the dark. Choose your metaphor. He must be in with Laurel, though, so he’ll probably be OK.	6. James: Last week’s MVP should be very proud of that move. You kept your people safe and you’ll easily get Angela and Chris to flip to your side. But, that moves signals the end of your under-the-radar days.
7. Libby: Libby could have totally screwed over her starting tribe allies. She didn’t. She’s safely in the mix, but that shouldn’t be confused with being in power.	7. Laurel: Laurel hasn’t felt comfortable during her first three cycles. And, she’s too savvy to feel that way much longer. The question is; if she works with Domenick and Wendell, who can she bring with her?
8. Michael: Objectively, he has an idol. Also objectively, not a terrible analog for James. So he’s not *that* safe.	8. Chelsea: It’s probably bad news that the only way we’re learning about what you’re up to is through my exit interviews.
9. Sebastian: He. Is. So. Great. Please just tell us more about your candy preferences. I have a feeling he has everyone at camp laughing, which is an incredibly valuable skill, even if it isn’t intentional.	9. Desiree: See Chelsea.
10. Chris: Chris’s dialogue with Libby was fantastic. “Dom possibly has an idol,” “You think?” “Yes, I know so” “oh.” He’s bossy, he can’t keep a secret, when something starts as possible it ends up certain, he cries – Chris is everything I want in a “Survivor” character.	10. Angela: You really should have seen last week coming. You knew a war was brewing between Chris and Domenick and you knew that Chris was safe (and sobbing) at Ghost Island. Hopefully that vote will serve as a wake-up call.
11. Bradley: I don’t think I’ve hated anything as much as Bradley hates Malolo beach.	11. Chris: “The Noble One” dodged a big bullet last week. But, another one could be coming his way if Domenick, Wendell, Laurel, and Domenick’s idol have anything to say about it.
12. Chelsea: *Crickets*	12. Michael: Seriously, how did it take so long to find James’s old idol? I know the wilderness is vast, but that thing is the size of a Trapper Keeper.
13. Desiree: *Shrug emoji*	13. Wendell: Could the Philadelphia connection help Wendell bond with Laurel? If not, he’s in big trouble. If it does, I’m all in. #TeamCheesesteak
14. Angela: It’s very difficult to get blindsided by the people who were blindsided. Big ep for Angela! Also, did you know she was in the military? That’s what I’ve learned.	14. Jenna: If the former Malolans get wind of Michael’s recent discovery, Jenna could be a smart vote to flush the idol.
15. Jenna: Jenna and Stephanie will be perceived as easy targets. Socially adept and unlikely to have an idol. Worried for them.	15. Stephanie: Writing “Hope” in the sand? Those are the actions of a woman whose tribe has lost immunity.
16. Stephanie: In the next episode she writes “hope” in the sand, which is a cry for help if I’ve ever seen one. She and Jenna are in a bad spot.	16. Brendan: The leader on the faction that is down in the numbers is never safe.
17. Brendan: Brendan is in trouble. Something is brewing there. He seems irritable and bossy. I don’t think he’s in a good spot.	17. Bradley: Bradley is annoying Brendan, Brendan’s alliance has an idol.  Bad news for Bradley?

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

Gordon Holmes: Often times a vote will be portrayed as a blindside…that wasn’t really a blindside. That looked like a blindside to me.
Morgan Ricke: It was really a blindside. It would have been a blindside to any of us. I mean, Angela was so clueless. She was so out of the Tribal, she didn’t even count. I think it would have been a blindside for Domenick or Wendell.

Holmes: People talk about “I knew something was up because someone wouldn’t look me in the eye.” In hindsight, did you sense anything like that?
Ricke: Right before we went to Tribal, I was getting a weird feeling from Libby. One of the very last questions she asked as we were packing up to go for Tribal was, “Are you a fan of ‘Survivor.’” Well, this is a huge question. Obviously I assumed she was a recruit. So, I’m like…does she want to know from the superfan side of it? If I am a fan and I’ve wanted to be on the show for years is she going to be too sad to vote me out? Why is she asking?! So, I played up the fact that I come from a large family and this is how our Wednesday nights were spent since I was 13 years old. I played up the family side of it because she’s a good little Catholic school girl. There was so much to that question. And once we started going to Tribal, Libby stopped looking at me. She stopped smiling, she stopped winking. And I was thinking, “Oh, (expletive deleted).” That’s why at Tribal you see me reassuring her. “Libby is gorgeous, and I trust her.” I was getting this vibe. I wanted her to think, “We’ve got this. I’m not turning on you.” Because she knew Angela was going to vote for her. We told her not to worry about it, because Angela is clueless. So, Libby was probably getting a little paranoid.

Holmes: There was a point where old Malolo seemed concerned about Domenick’s idol, so they had to decide between you and Wendell. Why do you think they went with you? I’d imagine it’d make sense from a game standpoint for Libby to try to keep you around.
Ricke: Correct. Libby did not want to vote me out. The relationship we had was real. I’ve gotten to talk to everyone since the game and James said that he thought I was the glue that was holding Naviti together. He said everyone likes you and that made him terrified. And Libby and I were immediately friends. James said we didn’t even say anything to each other and we were already sisters. “You talked about Catholic school and reality TV and the Kardashians, and ‘The Bachelor.’” We had so much in common that it was terrifying. And Angela liked me, we were fine. He felt like Chris and I had a good relationship. We weren’t in an alliance, but we talked together. I think it was because I was well liked and he won’t say this…but I kind of embarrassed James in challenges. He’s not very good at challenges. He’s a Harvard grad, he’s supposed to be super smart but he never does puzzles. The swimming challenge was difficult for him, the “Ninja Warrior” steps, he failed at that and had to go back. I was a strong female that at the merge would have won some challenges. And guys don’t like it when girls are better at them at things.

Holmes: Alright, word association time. Let’s start with Wendell.
Ricke: Behind-the-radar…but he forms good relationships with people. He really gets to know people for who they are.
Holmes: Chelsea?
Ricke: Ghost? Her edit is how she was. She’s going to hate me for saying this, but she didn’t do anything. Her and Desiree would be chilling in the bed. That’s what they did. I’m sure there’s some strategy somewhere, but I never saw it.
Holmes: Bradley?
Ricke: I love him. He’s one of my original alliance members. He talks so much (expletive deleted) and I think it’s hilarious. What you see is what you get.
Holmes: James?
Ricke: (Laughs) He voted me out! Solid move on James. Credit to him. Hopefully he can step it up in challenges. This guy has a super good IQ. I’d love to see him step up in puzzles.
Holmes: Laurel?
Ricke: Quiet…I hope she solves a puzzle at some point. She’s a strong female…she’s behind the radar.
Holmes: Domenick?
Ricke: My right-hand man. I love Domenick. My brother.
Holmes: Angela?
Ricke: I asked her questions and tried to get to know her, but she didn’t want to talk about her past. She got a divorce, she didn’t want to talk about it. She’s in the military, she didn’t want to talk about that.
Holmes: Sebastian?
Ricke: Laffy Taffy! I love Sebastian. We’re both water people, we’re both Florida people. He’s so passionate about what he does. He’s so happy. We see everything in rainbows.
Holmes: Donathan?
Ricke: He had this hero edit, which is good for Donathan. I don’t know. I saw him sit there, during the water challenge saying, “I’m not going to do it.” It took him a long time. It took Jeff Probst yelling at him for him to get in the water to become that hero. I see why fans like the guy. He’s playing low-key. He didn’t say much.
Holmes: Chris?
Ricke: Chris is…what you see is what you get. He has his one liners. I never had a problem with how he treated me. Some of them did. I get him. He’s funny, but people take it the wrong way.
Holmes: Desiree?
Ricke: Hopefully she starts playing. She’s good in challenges.
Holmes: Kellyn?
Ricke: Love her. She’s awesome, she’s hilarious, she’s quirky.
Holmes: Let’s finish with Libby.
Ricke: Your cute…southern girl. I still love her. I hope she goes far. I have nothing negative to say about her.

Holmes: We didn’t get to see much of the politics around Naviti outside of the Chris/Domenick feud. What would have happened if the original Naviti had gone to Tribal?
Ricke: It would’ve been a five-five split. We were hoping to pull Sebastian or Chelsea. But Chelsea didn’t…game. We were hoping to tell her she was going home and pull her. We also wanted Sebastian because everyone loves Sebastian.
Holmes: When you say five-five, was that yourself, Wendell, Domenick, Bradley, and Kellyn?
Ricke: Correct.

Holmes: Was there anything out there that you wish we’d seen?
Ricke: It was a good portrayal of me. I had a ton of fun out there. The sunset, the stars at night, I was enjoying everything. We were constantly staying up and keeping the fire going. You didn’t see how much I held back at the water challenge. (Laughs) I couldn’t have gone any slower if I wanted to. The challenges were pretty easy for me. I think the crazy thing is after nine days I felt good. I still had energy. I didn’t feel weak. I was proud of myself for that.

Holmes: Did you tell anybody about the legacy advantage?
Ricke: I did not tell anybody. I actually kept my mouth shut.
Holmes: Look at you!
Ricke: It’s shocking. (Laughs)

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Last Week: Kellyn showed a lot of spirit, Chris was spooked by the thought of Domenick having an idol, and Gonzalez and Jacob didn’t stand a ghost of a chance.

39 Days, 20 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

The tribes as they currently stand…

The Naviti Tribe (wearing purple)
Angela, 42 – Army Veteran
Bradley, 26 – Law Student
Chelsea, 24 – EMT/Professional Cheerleader
Chris, 27 – Male Model
Desiree, 21 – Student
Domenick, 38 – Construction Supervisor
Kellyn, 31 – Career Counselor
Morgan, 29 – Marine Animal Trainer
Sebastian, 22 – Fishing Guide
Wendell, 33 – Furniture Company Owner

The Malolo Tribe (wearing orange)
Brendan, 41 – Physical Education Teacher
Donathan, 26 – Caretaker
James, 24 – Business Analyst
Jenna, 23 – Advertising Account Executive
Laurel, 29 – Financial Consultant
Libby, 24 – Social Media Strategist
Michael, 18 – Real Estate Agent
Stephanie, 34 – Yoga Instructor

Post-Tribal Shenanigans

Libby tries to make James feel better about the votes he received by telling him not to hate himself. Really? There are plenty of people he should be hating other than himself.

Costume Change

Next up, both tribes meet up with Probst. Naviti does not seem surprised that Jacob is gone.

Donathan returns from Ghost Island™ and he doesn’t seem particularly shocked to see how the vote turned out either.

Everyone seems pretty happy with their teams, Libby even doubles down on Jacob’s assertion that Malolo is the best tribe ever. So of course Probst decides to switch them up.

Someone named Angela is pretty freaked out because she really liked her tribe.

When the dust settles, we’re left with…

The Naviti Tribe (wearing purple)
Angela, 42 – Army Veteran
Chris, 27 – Male Model
Donathan, 26 – Caretaker
Domenick, 38 – Construction Supervisor
James, 24 – Business Analyst
Libby, 24 – Social Media Strategist
Laurel, 29 – Financial Consultant
Morgan, 29 – Marine Animal Trainer
Wendell, 33 – Furniture Company Owner

The Malolo Tribe (wearing orange)
Bradley, 26 – Law Student
Brendan, 41 – Physical Education Teacher
Chelsea, 24 – EMT/Professional Cheerleader
Desiree, 21 – Student
Jenna, 23 – Advertising Account Executive
Kellyn, 31 – Career Counselor
Michael, 18 – Real Estate Agent
Sebastian, 22 – Fishing Guide
Stephanie, 34 – Yoga Instructor

First Impressions: We’ve got a 5-4 split on both tribes. And boy…Malolo looks like a force to be reckoned with as they have Sebastian, Michael, and Brendan.

At New Naviti Beach

The former Malotians are very impressed with Naviti beach. Apparently, they have the better shelter and two fire pits. Ooo…what are the property taxes?

Chris and Angela immediately start trying to figure out a way to get rid of Domenick. It’s a very awkward conversation with Chris talking down to Angela in a weird way. Angela picks up on it immediately.

Later, Chris approaches the former Malolo players about going after Domenick. In the process, he manages to rub Libby the wrong way too. Two for two with the ladies today, Chris.

Fortunately for Libby, she finds a former Naviti person she likes much better in Morgan. The duo bonds over their Catholicism…apparently.

At New Malolo Beach

The former Navitians are not impressed with the Malolo camp. And Brendan does a TERRIBLE job of selling it to them. Immediately he’s like, “Yeah, it’s probably not great. We should change it.”

Kellyn compares it to a friend’s baby that you have to pretend is cute. I wonder what her friends are thinking as they watch this?

Bradley, in particular, doesn’t like the new beach. And…he’s not wrong. Naviti is way nicer. However, Stephanie and Brendan don’t appreciate the negativity.

Realizing that old Naviti isn’t going to split up, the former Malolans go on a mad hunt for the hidden immunity idol. Michael eventually finds one of the idols that James was holding when he was voted out of China.

Quick Aside: That idol is enormous! It’s like the size of a clipboard. How would you hide that thing? Maybe it just looked smaller in giant James’s hands.

Immunity Challenge Time: The two teams will race across an “American Ninja Warrior”-esque obstacle course. They’ll then lift up a teammate to retrieve a rope. The rope will be used to climb a (non-warped) wall. The first team to complete the puzzle at the top of the tower will win immunity and a tarp.

Result: It was pretty even up until the puzzle portion, but Kellyn and Bradley destroyed it. Malolo wins immunity.

Malolo has to decide who to send to Ghost Island, and the vote has to be unanimous. They can’t come to decision, so rocks are pulled. Chris gets the unlucky (lucky?) rock.

At Ghost Island

Chris doesn’t get the opportunity to play a game, but the time alone gives him a chance to reflect. He cries quite a bit, discussing his mother’s battle with MS. He hopes this will give him a chance to regroup and continue the game with a clear head.

Pre-Tribal Policking

Angela decides that she’s not ready to go with Chris’s plan and break from old Naviti. She tells Wendell how she feels and he doesn’t seem to buy it.

She also tells Wendell that she’s willing to go to rocks if there’s a tie. He’s not quite up for that, so he thinks targeting Angela is their best bet.

When discussing numbers, Morgan assures Wendell that Libby will vote with them. It seems like all of the former Malolans are in on this vote.

In an effort to earn more of their trust, Domenick shows the Maloloans the fake idol and confesses that it was made to throw Chris off of his scent. He even swears on his children that he’s with them.

It looks like Dom is coming on way too strong and they don’t buy it. James is worried that the fake idol is to cover for a real idol. Wow! Good call, James.

So, they decide to target Wendell or Morgan in case the idol is real. Libby doesn’t like the idea of sending her new bestie home.

Tribal Time

Everyone is acting like it’s going to be a straight up old Malolo vs. old Naviti vote. I’m sure all of this talk is for Angela’s benefit.

Libby is asked about lying, and she admits that it’s part of the game. Morgan laughs because she thinks Libby is adorable, but will probably have to lie at some point.

Voting Time: Angela voted for Libby, Morgan voted for Angela, and the rest of the votes are sooper secret.

Probst tallies and returns. He asks if anyone wants to play an idol and…nobody does. We’ve got one vote for Libby, three votes for Angela, three votes for Morgan, and the third person voted out of “Survivor: Ghost Island” is…Morgan.

On her way out, Morgan says, “Don’t trust the cute blonde.” Should Angela take offense to that?

Morgan willed her legacy advantage to Domenick during her closing remarks.

Verdict: This episode is a good example of why I don’t love swaps. Can you point to anything Morgan did wrong her whole time out there? I can’t. She didn’t play too fast. She didn’t upset anyone. She didn’t tell anyone about her legacy advantage. She didn’t wash her feet in the cooking pot. And yet, she’s gone. Blah.

 

	James – Heck of a move by James this week. With that vote he kept all of old Mololo safe and he will have perfect inroads to work with Angela and Chris next week. Bravo. Michael – Great rebound with the idol find, my friend.
	Kellyn – Another big puzzle win. But being super honest with old Malolo might have inspired their frantic idol hunt.
	Libby – You’re still in good shape, but you clearly didn’t win the big Morgan/Wendell debate.
	Domenick – Your plan did not go according…to plan. But, you’re obviously making good enough connections to get Morgan’s advantage. Chris – What does it say about the Chris/Domenick feud that everyone from old Malolo was turned off by both of them?
	Angela – I’m giving you a low grade for not sensing what was up. But you’re going to be in a good spot next week. Bradley – You’ve got to be more careful with the vibes you’re putting out there. Wendell – You almost paid the price this week. It could’ve easily been you.
	Donathan, Brendan, Sebastian, Stephanie, Jenna, Chelsea, Desiree, Laurel – I can’t give you full credit if you don’t show your work.

Power Rankings Results: Roark had Morgan in spot seven, I had her in spot twelve. The current score is Team Roark 7, Team Gordon 12.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

The Rules: Each week our two combatants will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the players will earn. For example, if Kellyn is voted out this episode, Roark will receive two points and Gordon will receive four points. At the end of the season, the person with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Ghost Island” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

Quick Note: Rankings are not based on who the player thinks is most likely to win. The smart strategy is to rank players based on how safe you think they are in the upcoming vote.

Roark’s Score: 0 Any questions for Roark? Drop her a line on Twitter: @roarkstweets	Gordon’s Score: 0 Any questions for Gordon? Drop him a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes
1. Domenick: I am patting myself on the back for this preseason ranking, and for now, I am not moving Dom anywhere. Unless he ends up giving Chris the fake idol, I am not sure what the point of telling him was, but A for effort, Dom, keep it up.	1. Domenick: A swap already?! What are you trying to do to me, Probst? How am I supposed to rank all the people that haven’t been shown saying or doing anything? Ugh…oh well…Domenick has an idol. He’s smart enough to know when he needs to use it.
2. Kellyn: Kellyn was prominently featured in the premiere, despite winning both challenges and not really being involved in the Dom – Chris alliance scuffle. This tells me she is sticking around for a bit.	2. Stephanie: And another thing, are we swapping to two tribes or three? That makes a big difference. You can hide in a tribe of nine. If you end up on a tribe of six with five members of the other tribe, it’s probably bad news. Grr…Steph was amazing last week. She should be able to wriggle out of any swap trouble.
3. Donathan: “Survivor Season 36: Donathan Island”	3. Wendell: And I have to make all new images! These take a long time to put together! Anywho, yay me for my winner pick making it to the third episode. Add to that the fact that everyone on his tribe seems to like him and be willing to work with him, and he should be fine during the swap.
4. Wendell: Wendell did not slide into my DMs, per our deal, so no first place ranking for him. Regardless, he remains high in the rankings as we heard from him several times despite avoiding Tribal twice.	4. James: Your diving issue last week might turn out to be a blessing in disguise. A million-dollar body is a lot less intimidating after you’ve seen a dude struggle to perform during a challenge.
5. Sebastian: He is fantastic comedic relief and I need him here for a long time giving us malaphors in every confessional.	5. Kellyn: They didn’t show a lot of Kellyn last episode, but from my vantage point when I was out there, her tribe was loving her. Her enthusiasm wasn’t coming off as hokey and she got most of the credit for completing the cube puzzle. She’s a sleeper pick to take this whole thing.
6. Laurel: Laurel was relatively quiet across the two episode premiere. That said, she is clearly trusted by her tribemates and built that trust across two Tribals. Granted, they seemed like easy votes, but she seems safe om this tribe of misfits.	6. Bradley: Lookit, Bradley…lurking out there…being buddies with everyone. He’s a perfect example of someone living by the credo; you can’t win it on day one, but you can certainly lose it there. Keep your eyes on him.
7. Morgan: Morgan’s bright and bubbly, just as expected. She also seems incredibly useful in challenges. Stephanie could spill the beans on her legacy advantage, but it seems early for that.	7. Laurel: Laurel didn’t pull the trigger on getting rid of Michael last week, but she probably didn’t have to. She appreciates that she was on the outs, but it’s early in the game and there’s no need to rock the boat just yet.
8. Stephanie: Stephanie impressed me. She’s shown herself to be socially competent and willing to not rock the boat or die on the sword of her own personal preferences.	8. Libby: There’s Libby, just kinda hanging out in the middle of the dominant alliance. Not a threat to anyone. Probably a good place to be early in the game.
9. Brendan: Brendan is *very* in the mix and is strong in his opinions. He let his thoughts on the vote be known and he would not be pushed around. That should work for a little while longer…	9. Chelsea: I spent an hour on Naviti Beach on day two. It looked like Chelsea and Desiree were working together with Chris thinking incorrectly that he had Desiree in his pocket. What does that mean for Chelsea’s game going forward? Who knows. But she’s doing stuff.
10. Michael: Despite losing the first two challenges, Michael has clearly been deemed indispensable. For the time being.	10. Angela: Hey, buddy! Having fun out there? Hope so. Drop us all a line when you get a chance.
11. Jenna: Jenna was also quiet throughout these two episodes. She seems affable and gets along with Stephanie. Probably safe.	11. Sebastian: Dropping names before you’ve even lost immunity? Rookie mistake, Sea Bass. Lucky for you Domenick probably holds Chris accountable. Just relax, kick back, and catch some of those giant lobsters that are out there.
12. Bradley: From here down, consider all these people ranked the same. Massive tie at twelfth place. Well, expect James. It should be no surprise that most of them come from Naviti, the tribe that got less screen-time. I apologize for seeming flippant, but as someone who was invisible on a winning tribe until a boot episode screen-time spike – I feel y’alls pain. Don’t hate me.	12. Morgan: So, it’s probably safe to assume that Stephanie is the only person who knows about Morgan’s legacy advantage. If they end up on the same tribe, that could bring them together. Or…it could be a reason for Stephanie to target Morgan.
13. Desiree: Crushed the basketball portion of the second immunity challenge. Besides that – unknown.	13. Michael: Jacob has me thinking that Michael isn’t very self-aware. He might want to stop and think about why people were targeting him.
14. Libby: Her tribe went to Tribal both hours and still very unsure about who she is.	14. Jenna: You seem to be close with the Brendan/Michael alliance, but why was your name being tossed around?
15. Chris: Dom seems like a train at full speed, and Chris is currently standing in its path.	15. Brendan: Gonzalez was not subtle in letting us know that Brendan was running the show. That could get in him in a bit of trouble after a swap.
16. Angela: Apparently a human woman on the Naviti tribe.	16. Desiree: You’re bad at slide puzzles, you’re good at buoy basketball. I still worry about you because of the whole, “Making up a baby back home” plan you were bouncing around.
17. Chelsea: Who?	17. Donathan: They played up that diving thing to be a big moment for Donathan, but watching it back…it didn’t look that good. His tribe was basically begging him to go back in. He could be a goner if a tribe gets serious about challenge strength.
18. James: Pretty sure he drowned. RIP.	18. Chris: If Domenick and Chris end up on the same tribe and they lose immunity, Chris is going home. He’ll see this as his chance to send Domenick packing, it’ll escalate, and there will be no turning back. Domenick is too savvy and Chris doesn’t have a great read on how people perceive him.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

WARNING: The following “Survivor” article has very little actual “Survivor” content in it.

Watch Full Episodes of “Survivor: Ghost Island”

I know what you’re thinking, “Hey Gordon, where’s that once-a-year article you write about the press immunity challenge where it looks like you’re going to lose, but somehow pull off a victory and learn a valuable lesson?”

That article is not coming.

Oh, the press immunity challenge happened, it was the one from the premiere where they had to pull the block puzzle pieces on a sled. And the lesson I learned was, “Sometimes you get your (expletive deleted) kicked.” Trust me, it does not require 2,000 words. It was so bad that newly minted press member Andrea Boehlke was desperately trying to switch teams.

So, my challenge winning streak was snapped at nine straight. And while a career record of 9 and 2 is still impressive, it certainly isn’t 10 in a row.

Ten immunity wins would have been epic. Just…the perfect round number. I had even imagined posing for a photo with a giant “10” written in the sand.

It’s kind of stupid, but I’ll admit to being down in the dumps about it.

And as bummed out as I was it wasn’t nearly as bad as the thing that had happened a few days earlier.

The pre-game interviews had taken longer than expected, so we were granted an extension. While Hollywood Reporter’s Josh Wigler and I were finishing up, EW’s Dalton Ross, ET Canada’s Erin Cebula, and CBS’s Andrea Boehlke were going to get to run through the water/basketball challenge.

I wasn’t heartbroken to miss this because swimming isn’t my strongest skill and I wanted the best opportunity to retain the winning streak that nobody cares about except for me.

Here’s where it gets bad.

We were hoping to get to the water challenge in time to watch them perform, but we were told we probably weren’t going to make it. We were told wrong. For some reason, the challenge was delayed. And when multi-time Emmy award winner and everyone’s favorite blue, button-down shirt model Jeff Probst asked me to participate I told him I couldn’t because I didn’t have the proper swimming attire.

That was a lie.

I could have easily participated in the shorts I was wearing. I just didn’t want to risk my precious streak.

In hindsight that sounds really stupid. How many “Survivor” fans would kill for the opportunity I turned down?

I’ve made a career out of saying “Yes” when other people have said “Meh” and it has served me really well.

So, I sat…and I watched…and I hated myself for doing it.

Fast forward to the end of the press immunity challenge; I’m a sweaty mess, my hands are callused hunks of hamburger, and all I want is a nap.

Never one to shy away from making a bad situation worse, Probst pulled me aside to offer me a third challenge.

“You know how we’re giving them less food this season?” he asked.

“I do,” I responded.

“I want to send you out to one of the beaches with our fishing expert to show everyone how hard it is to catch a fish,” he explained.

“Oh…so go out there, catch a fish and then let everyone know how difficult it is for somebody who has little-to-no experience?”

“Oh no. I would say you’re not going to get a fish,” he assured me.

“So…”

He continued, “Yeah, I asked if our fishing expert would be able to do it. And they said, no problem. Like 100%. But you, with no experience, probably like 1%.”

“Uh huh…”

He capped off his bright idea by saying, “And then he’ll show you how to start a fire and you can talk about how hard that is too.”

I shot back, “And what are the odds I’ll be able to do that?”

“Probably…maybe…who knows? Stranger things have happened.”

With that vote of confidence from a national icon bouncing around my head I had the whole evening to figure out how I wasn’t going to embarrass myself. There wasn’t much I could do to prepare for the fishing, but for years I’ve been the biggest proponent of contestants LEARNING HOW TO MAKE (EXPLETIVE DELETED) FIRE BEFORE GOING ON THE SHOW.

So, I did what any other person from my generation would do; I sat in my hotel room and watched fire-making YouTube videos.

The next thing I knew, I was on a boat with tanned, toned, Hawaiian fishing god Joaquin and his crew members as we jetted off to one of this season’s unused beaches.

When we arrived, I double-checked with Joaquin to make sure that I didn’t have to be concerned about sharks or anything. He assured me that there were occasionally sharks in the area, but we probably didn’t have to worry about anything.

Ahem…probably.

FUN FACT: Joaquin and I are totally Facebook bros now. Like a week after this trip took place, he posted something about having to dive back into a boat to avoid a shark. Thanks, buddy.

First, Joaquin showed me the Hawaiian sling the contestants were using. It was old and rickety. He told me not to worry though, because he had a better one for me. I hated to do it, but I told him the story wouldn’t work if I was using better equipment than the contestants. He agreed, and went about showing me how to use it.

So basically, the Hawaiian sling is a long spear with four sharp prongs on one end and a large rubber band on the other. You take the rubber band into your hand then stretch it up the length of the pole. You point the spear at your target, then release it. The rubber band will launch the spear toward your prey, catching it easily, and turning you into your tribe’s hero.

Then, he showed me the crappy old flippers and goggles the contestants would receive, but he assured me he had better ones for me. Once again, I had to turn them down.

Equipped with the finest in 1950s fishing gear, I hit the water. And as if the moisture in the Fijian sea was too much for the ancient rubber to handle, the strap on my left flipper immediately disintegrated. I retrieved the now-useless flipper and tossed it back into the boat. I guess I’ll just swim in a circle.

Undeterred I readied my spear and set off to prove Jeff Probst wrong. Once I was underwater I was happy to discover dozens of potential entrees.

I slowly stalked my prey, aimed my weapon, and released it. And boy, if those fish didn’t have a sixth sense as to when a rubber band was about to be released. Those little suckers would immediately dart out of the way.

I’d readjust my spear, get close enough to lunch, release it, and they’d vanish. Lather, rinse, repeat.

And what was worse, sometimes I’d miss and be treated to the frustrating clang of the spear banging against the coral.

Release…clang!

Release…clang!

Release…clang!

Finally, I got the drop on a good-sized specimen. I slowly approached it, released the spear, and hit him!

…And he promptly wriggled off the spikes and swam down into the reef. I hovered above the reef for a while hoping maybe he’d die from his injuries, or old age or something, and float back to the surface. But, it never happened.

Ugh…I’d never appreciated Ozzy Lusth so much in my life.

I continued for about an hour and all I had to show for it was a gash on my hand from where I had to remove a piece of coral from my prongs. It was bleeding quite a bit, but I wasn’t worried because there weren’t any sharks in the area. (Right, Joaquin?)

Finally, I spotted a school of fish that didn’t seem too alarmed that a sunburnt, bleeding journalist was milling around their area. I targeted one, released the spear, and nabbed him. I immediately pointed the spear straight up so he couldn’t get away.

Victory!

In your face, Jeff Probst!

I surfaced and cheered like I had just won the World Series. Joaquin’s crew was greatly amused. I’m sure it’s the first time they’ve heard such a big fuss over such a small fish.

Joaquin heard the commotion and paddled over using flippers that were created in this century. He was clearly very proud of his pupil and told me to look under the water to see what he’d caught for lunch. I looked down and saw the biggest lobster I have ever seen attached to his belt.

Well, I’d happily share the world’s smallest fish with him if he was willing to share the world’s biggest lobster.

We hit the beach and Joaquin and I started our survival training. He showed me the proper way to open a coconut with a machete and various other techniques. But then it was time for the main event; fire making.

He retrieved a coconut shell and some kindling. From there he scraped off a small pile of magnesium and started striking the flint.

Spark…spark…nothing.

Spark…spark…nothing.

Spark…spark…nothing.

And while this probably didn’t bode well for my ability to start a fire, it was nice to see him having some trouble with it.

This went on for about twenty minutes with no success. Finally, Joaquin laughed and said, “I’m really more of a fishing guy.”

While this was going on, Joaquin’s crew had darted off in all directions. Immediately they had caught a ton more fish (and about four times the size of what I had procured). They also went into the forest and came back with other treats. They started a raging fire (using a lighter) and went about preparing a feast.

Realizing that all of this fire-attempting was going to get in the way of our lunch, Joaquin suggested I give it a go. I followed his instructions, remembered my YouTube training, and went to work.

I got my coconut shell, I got my kindling, I made a little pile of magnesium…

Spark…spark…nothing.

Spark…spark…nothing.

Spark…spark…nothing.

This went on for about fifteen minutes until…

Spark…spark…sizzle!

The magnesium finally caught! I slowly blew on the ember, hoping it would catch the kindling…and it did! Actual fire!

Joaquin and I jumped up and down and hugged as if we had just won the lottery. His crew members laughed again…which…come on, guys. You had a lighter.

With my trip to “Survivor” School finally completed, it was time to eat. I was presented with the fish I had caught earlier and took a bite out of it. It tasted like victory.

I offered to share it with my new tribe, but honestly, it would have been like trying to share a Tic Tac. Fortunately, they had prepared a ton of fish, Joaquin’s giant lobster, and various other things they had found around the island. And believe me when I say, it was all delicious. If these dudes ever decide to open up a seafood restaurant in Philadelphia, I’ll be there every day.

They even made a spicy dipping sauce using sea water and spices they had located. The only thing we ate that wasn’t caught or scavenged on location was a lemon they had brought for the fish. Amazing.

In fact, we ate so much that I was too full to have dinner when we got back to base camp. Just goes to show what a motivated tribe is capable of…if they are all fishing and wilderness experts.

That night at Tribal I told Probst my tale. And every time I’d see him after that he’d exclaim, “I still can’t believe you caught a fish.”

Believe it, buddy. Jeff had given me a challenge and I’d accomplished it. Surely this must count as that tenth win I was looking for, right?

Wrong.

I asked Probst…he said, “No.”

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Gordon Holmes: How are you holding up?
Jacob Derwin: I’m doing alright.
Holmes: That was hard to watch, my friend.
Derwin: Yeah, you’re telling me. (Laughs)
Holmes: You love “Survivor.” Where are you with it now that you had to watch everything you missed while you were out there?
Derwin: I had a lot of trouble watching 35. I watched very little of it, to be frank. And I feel bad because many of those people have reached out and been kind and we’ve had lovely conversations. I had a very bitter taste in my mouth. I’m going to commit to watching “Ghost Island” because I’m lucky to have friends on the cast. I want to support them. I don’t know about the people who said I was “the least social person on the planet” or that I was “special.” But, there are a lot of people that I support.
Holmes: You’re special to me, Jacob.
Derwin: Aww…thanks!

Holmes: Sometimes I’ll start this off with a snarky joke. And…I wrote one. But, I feel horrible about it.
Derwin: (Laughs) Nothing you can say can pierce this armor at this point. I am a husk of a man. I can’t feel a thing. Hit me, man.
Holmes: When they do “Ghost Island 2,” which of your cursed items will be out there; the shoes that floated away, the dirty sock you filled with rice, or the fake idol that nobody bought?
Derwin: (Laughs)
Holmes: I’m not proud of that.
Derwin: It’s alright. I think the shoes are long gone. (Laughs) They actually had a shot of it in the show! I was surprised. I didn’t see them go. I have the fake idol here if they want it.

Holmes: I spoke with Gonzalez a couple of minutes ago and asked why you were on the outs so quickly and she said that you just didn’t seem to fit in. What was your take on why you were having trouble connecting?
Derwin: I think that’s about right. I was making friends, but I wasn’t making enough friends. Laurel and James are people I liked a lot. I talked to Stephanie a lot, not just once. (Laughs) Kill me. We talked a lot out there. But, there was always that looming Michael, Brendan, Libby, Jenna thing. I couldn’t get in with them. I tried with Libby for a bit. Michael and I had nothing to connect over. Brendan and I could talk about music. But, I could see through it. He has this face he puts on when he’s talking cool with you.
Holmes: I was out there on day two and you and I snuck out for a little idol hunt. Was it was really that bad that quickly that you didn’t care if everyone knew what you were up to?
Derwin: Yes. I know a lot of the portrayal is I went searching for no good reason and that’s why I went home. But for the first few days, nobody would talk to me, Gordon. I would literally walk around with people…it’s the modern game of “Survivor.” People make alliances on day one. You talk game, “I don’t like this person, I do like this person.” I’d talk to people and ask about their game and they’d say, “I don’t really know yet, I haven’t thought about it.” And I’d be sitting there and thinking, so that means it’s me. It was really frustrating that nobody wanted to play with me. So, fine…if I need to protect myself, I need to protect myself. And if that’s what it looks like, so be it.

Holmes: So, you act up after the immunity challenge and Naviti decides to send you to Ghost Island. When you trick somebody…don’t tell them that you’re tricking them.
Derwin: (Laughs) Gordon, my plan at that point was to make Naviti hate me.
Holmes: Mission accomplished!
Derwin: (Laughs) I was hoping they’d keep sending me back. And unfortunately it didn’t go as planned. It worked once.
Holmes: You weren’t the first person at Ghost Island, our friend Josh Wigler from the Hollywood Reporter got to break it in. Did he leave behind a noticeable smell?
Derwin: (Laughs) I got there and it looked like someone had tried to make a fire.
Holmes: I said you were the perfect person to go there first. You must’ve been like two friends in a candy store.
Derwin: I didn’t recognize everything, I’m not that crazy. I was having a good time walking around and seeing stuff. It almost makes it a little more embarrassing because it feels like this season was formulated for me, right? The entire twist is there’s an entire place based on previous seasons. You need to know the game.

Holmes: You’re using words like “embarrassed,” which is understandable. But, I think a good takeaway from this for you could be; you’re proof that “Survivor” is easy…to play on your couch.
Derwin: It’s hard to say this because I know it sounds dumb, but I believe I could have pulled something off. I believe that I can play this game. But, I also believe that I did a few things quickly wrong. And in my efforts to save myself I just made the target bigger. That’s how it goes sometimes. Great players can go home early and bad players can stay until the end.

Holmes: When Brendan called out the lack of an idol letter, did you know you were in trouble?
Derwin: I knew it was going to come up. He’s right, I know the game too well. There were a lot of different things I could have done. I was thinking of wrapping it in the parchment from the urn. But then I thought, if they saw what it said it’d be bad. I thought maybe it was glued inside of the bamboo and I couldn’t get it out. Honestly, the most believable one I could think of was, “Crap, where did it go?” (Laughs)
Holmes: (Laughs)
Derwin: It’s not great. But I thought the people who didn’t know the game well, the Libbys might believe it.
Holmes: I needed it for kindling.
Derwin: I could’ve said I needed fire, so I burnt my souvenir. I almost tried to sell Ghost Island as desolate. But when you get there it’s like a resort. Better shelter than the one on Malolo.

Holmes: Heading into Tribal, if you had to put a percentage on how much you trusted Stephanie, what would it be?
Derwin: Maybe 25%. It was there, I thought there was a chance. It was a crazy plan because we were pulling together people who didn’t want to work together. Laurel wasn’t a huge fan of Stephanie. I’m trying to pull people together who haven’t talked to each other much. I’m the common thread and I’m not a good common thread at this point. Stephanie did legitimately think about working with me which makes me feel better. She did talk to Jenna about it. And I talked to Laurel and James. If we all got together, maybe we could have pulled it off. But, when you’re the obvious boot and you’re trying to gather forces against everyone’s favorite golden boy? It’s a tough thing to pull off.
Holmes: When you voted for Michael, your comment about him needing to listen more seemed a little biting considering how little we had seen you two interact. What was behind that?
Derwin: Michael talks a lot. (Laughs) I did have trouble fitting in with the tribe because we’d sit around and talk. And they’d talk and talk about burritos from Chipotle and their orders and Instagram followers. And I’m sitting there, how do I talk to you? I have Michael’s Chipotle order committed to memory because I’ve heard it so many times. And I was only there for six days. And he played a better game, I can admit that. But, there’s a sea of dark anger toward him because of how frustrating I found him out there.

Holmes: Alright, word association time. Let’s start with Brendan.
Derwin: Steady as a White Stripes rhythm section.
Holmes: Gonzalez?
Derwin: She deserves better. She deserves a lot better.
Holmes: Rainbow Stephanie?
Derwin: (Laughs) My mom is cooler than your mom.
Holmes: Libby?
Derwin: Princess.
Holmes: Laurel?
Derwin: Smarter than any of us will ever be.
Holmes: James?
Derwin: Also smarter than any of us will ever be. He also has the best posture I have ever seen in my life.
Holmes: Donathan?
Derwin: The War on Drugs.
Holmes: Jenna?
Derwin: Who?
Holmes: Jenna?
Derwin: Yeah…who?
Holmes: I see what you did there. Let’s finish with Michael.
Derwin: Burrito bowl with an extra tortilla on the side.

Holmes: Should I be worried about “The War on Drugs” for Donathan?
Derwin: It’s a band, he’s a big fan of the band. It’s the main thing we connected with out there.
Holmes: OK, good. I’m an old man, Jacob. I don’t know about your new-fangled bands.
Derwin: No, it’s dad rock. It’s good stuff.

Holmes: We need to talk about the rice sock.
Derwin: (Laughs) Oh no.
Holmes: How much grief have you gotten from people who had to eat rice that was seasoned with your foot?
Derwin: No one! Not a single person on the cast. And I told people out there. When I was trying to get with Libby I told her, but she was uninterested. And I told Stephanie Johnson about it, she came back and saw a few grains of rice on the floor and she said, “You’ve got to clean that up right now. You don’t want them to see that.” Look, I wanted to put it all back in the jar. And I’ll tell you what, I checked Twitter and a few former players have said, “No, that’s what you do. If you have a hunch, you go for it. They’re going to boil it later anyways.”

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

QUICK NOTE: XFINITY.com is the place to be for all of your bug-eatin’, back-stabbin’, “Survivor” coverage. During the season we’ll have insightful weekly Power Rankings with Roark Luskin, exit interviews, and full episode recaps. Follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute updates.

Gordon Holmes: How are you?
Stephanie Gonzalez: I am great! I’m sitting in a bubble bath.
Holmes: What? That is how you do exit press. Well done.
Gonzalez: That’s how you do it.

Holmes: Let’s talk about last night’s horrible fiasco. Immediately you have an easy target because Jacob is on the outs with your tribe. What was he doing that put him in that position?
Gonzalez: Jacob was on the outs because…I think it was a self-realization of how different he really was. He already knew he was going to be different because he’s a little more quirky, a little bit of a different personality, which I love by the way. I think he’s a cool guy. He got to camp and we realized he stood out. He realized it and thought he was in danger because he wasn’t a part of the conversations we were having. Everyone had some kind of fit…other than Donathan. But, he was a little more charismatic and in with the girls. It was easier for him. He’s gay and we love gay guys because they’re a part of us. We feel like we can talk to him. And Jacob didn’t have that flirty personality or leader, charismatic charm. He’s just this cute, goofy guy.
Holmes: And once he realized that, he started the idol hunting?
Gonzalez: Yeah, he was like, “Game on. I need to find an idol to stick around longer.”

Holmes: You were very vocal about the challenge puzzle. What happened there?
Gonzalez: It was a (expletive deleted) show. We all talked about different tasks we were going to be doing. The physical part, I don’t know that Jacob felt confident. So, he did the puzzle part. He said he’d been practicing puzzles. And he didn’t do so well. I think at one point we were uniformly instructing people what to do because they were having a meltdown.

Holmes: You lose the challenge, he goes to Ghost Island. And this wasn’t aired last night, but you said you went on a five-minute walk, and when you came back everything was different. Nobody would look you in the eye. What was the plan before the walk?
Gonzalez: The plan was to go with Donathan or Jenna. I spoke to Brendan about it. Me and Brendan were kind of working together on the low. Even me and Michael. What they didn’t show at Tribal was, when I was whispering I asked Brendan who he was voting for. Then I asked Michael because…there was no blindside…I knew what was going on. I spoke to Brendan and he told me one person and Michael told me another. And I knew he and Michael were the tightest next to Stephanie and Jenna. So, I spoke to Libby…who was a little more clueless about the game plan. I said, “Brendan said, ‘We’re not voting for me anymore,’ you’re going to vote for Donathan.” And she said, “It’s not you anymore? OK, Donathan.” So, that confirmed that they were voting for me.
Holmes: So, why you?
Gonzalez: Michael and I had a conversation before Tribal and I told him we have to keep the tribe strong. We already saw that the other tribe is strong. We need to level up. And Michael agreed. And I told him that I’m really good at puzzles and I was strong in the challenge. The more obvious person was Donathan. And Michael said, “You sound like you’re pleading your case. You’re sticking around. We need you.” At that point he hadn’t talked to everyone else. And when I wandered off they switched the vote. It was between Donathan and Jenna. But Donathan spoke to Brendan and me and Brendan fell for it. Donathan was tearing up and was emotional. He started bawling and Brendan said, “I don’t want to send the kid home.” So, he wanted to target one of the stronger girls. And guess who that was?
Holmes: Awww… When you were voted out you said, “One lion, seven sheep, sad.” My guess is that Brendan is the lion, right?
Gonzalez: Correct!

Holmes: Alright, word association time. Let’s start with Brendan.
Gonzalez: Chief.
Holmes: Stephanie?
Gonzalez: Rainbow.
Holmes: Laurel?
Gonzalez: Anonymous.
Holmes: Libby?
Gonzalez: Nair. (Laughs)
Holmes: Donathan?
Gonzalez: Exciting.
Holmes: Jacob?
Gonzalez: Soft.
Holmes: Michael?
Gonzalez: L.A.
Holmes: James?
Gonzalez: Calculating.
Holmes: Jenna?
Gonzalez: Hot dog.
Holmes: Hot dog?
Gonzalez: It’s her favorite food. I’ve never met anyone in my life who would choose a hot dog.
Holmes: A hot dog is good, but your favorite food?
Gonzalez: Right? What’s the best food?
Holmes: Garlic bread.
Gonzalez: (Laughs) Yeah.

Holmes: When you’re watching it last night and you’re seeing Jacob poor your rice supply into his dirty sock…what was your reaction?
Gonzalez: Honestly, everyone was freaking out because Jacob put rice in his sock. I had a viewing party and there were like 200 people there and everyone was like, “Oh my God! No way!” Women were cringing and covering their eyes. And I’m thinking, “Well, we have to boil water to cook rice.” I didn’t think it was a big deal.
Holmes: Blah…
Gonzalez: I knew he was looking for idols. I called him out on it. “Jacob, did you disappear for three hours?”

Holmes: Was there anything out there that we didn’t get to see that you wish we had?
Gonzalez: I wish they’d have shown more of the shelter building. Or, the talks with me, Brendan, and Michael. That was an instrumental part of my story. If they’d shown me helping them build the shelter…I was the dirtiest by a long shot. And it wasn’t because I was wearing a yellow dress, I was fil…thy.

Holmes: When you’re voted out first it’s probably because you’re a weirdo, you’re a jerk, or you’re a threat. Is it any solace that it was probably because you were a threat?
Gonzalez: Nothing will bring me inner peace, but if there is one way to be voted out first, it’s because you’re a threat. If I saw myself on TV and it was because people thought I was annoying? Or she’s dumb or a nuisance? I’d take it so personal.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes