I snagged a Wacom for my birthday and I’ve been obsessed with it. As in, I sit down on the couch with it when I get home after work, then crawl up to bed seven hours later. So, here are some of my early efforts…
Archive for August, 2011
INT. A LIVING ROOM – DAY
A GUY and a GIRL are seated on a couch together.
The guy uses the remote control to flip through the channels of an impressive television.
The girl isn’t interested in what’s on the television. She’s reading something on her phone.
Who do you think would win in a
fight between Rizzoli and Isles?
The girl doesn’t answer.
OK, what if it was Rizzoli and Franklin
against Isles and Bash?
The girl still doesn’t answer.
Rizzoli, Franklin and Cagney squaring
off against Isles, Bash, and Lacey?
Still no answer from the girl.
Rizzoli, Franklin, Cagney, and Starsky
versus Isles, Bash, Lacey, and Hutch?
The girl finally acknowledges the guy. She turns to him and gives him an annoyed look.
Rizzoli, Franklin, Cagney, Starsky, and
Hart in a no-holds-barred fight with
Isles, Bash, Lacey, Hutch, and Hart!
I guess Isles, Bash, Lacey, Hutch, and Hart.
What?! Right off the bat, you’re telling
me Hart wouldn’t cream Hart?
Wait, which Hart is which?
I always assumed the male Hart was
OK, here’s where I kill my cool cred.
(But Gordon, how can you lose something you never had?)
From time to time I’ll scour YouTube looking for sweet acapella songs.
Yes, really. I also talk to myself.
Back to my original point, from time to time I’ll scour YouTube looking for cool acapella songs. Today I found this sweet mash-up of Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” and Bell Biv DeVoe’s “Poison” from a group called “Straight No Chaser.”
When flipping channels, there are three things that must be watched until completion if they are stumbled upon…
- ‘Rocky’ Movies
- ‘Cake Boss’
I don’t know what it is about Buddy and his lovable band of cake-a-teers (not a word) but I can’t get enough of ’em. Part of me is jealous of them. What an awesome job it must be to get to create edible works of art all day.
For some reason, I got it into my head that I could make my own super-cool cake. What gave me this idea? I don’t know. I’ve never baked anything, ever. But, I’ve watched the show a jillion times. Surely I’ve learned something through osmosis.
Note: My buddy at work is amused that I’m always trying stupid crap like this. He wants to create a pilot called “How Hard Could It Be?” where I watch a TV show and then try to duplicate the skill it’s taken them years to perfect. Sometimes it’ll turn out well like my clay “Community” snowman Senor Chang and sometimes it’ll turn out like the otter birthday cake…
Facebook and Twitter followers probably know that I’ve been cranking out a ton of wrestling content this week with interviews with Hulk Hogan, Rob Van Dam, Kane, and Edge. However, I recently did a fifth interview that slipped through the cracks.
You see, I was only scheduled to interview Kane at SDCC’s Mattel booth. However, once I finished up, it turns out that some outlet had stood up WWE’s Divas Champion Kelly Kelly. (Who on Earth would do that? Ever?)
They asked if I wanted to interview her, and I (shockingly) said “Yes.”
Unfortunately, I didn’t have any questions prepared and we were cut off when she had to run to another event. Generally my style is to start with fun banter, then move onto deeper topics, so all I was left with was fun banter. Not really something to base an XFINITYTV interview around.
But, some fans may find in entertaining, so here it is…
INT. A BOSTON MARKET RESTAURANT – NIGHT
A GUY and a GIRL are patiently waiting for their order to be fulfilled. They are both standing at the register.
BOSTON MARKET WORKERS go about their business preparing the order.
The guy looks near the register and sees a large package of brownies. The package is labeled “Family Brownies.”
Apparently all of those brownies are related.
No, it’s good. They’ll all be together.
Yeah, but then they’ll have to see their family members be devoured.