Posts Tagged ‘Randy Bailey’

‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 5

October 20, 2010

The Rules: Each week, “Survivor: Tocantins” and “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” star Benjamin “Coach” Wade and XFINITY TV’s “Survivor” recapper Gordon Holmes will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 3 points and Gordon will receive 6 points. At the end of the season, the person or team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Three things disappeared last week; the Medallion of Power, Tyrone, and Team Dragon Slayer’s sizable lead. Coach and “The King of Gabon” Randy Bailey had Tyrone in spot three. While Gordon called it, having Tyrone in spot sixteen.

This Week: Two people are going home as both tribes will square off in individual immunity challenges.

Now, let’s have a quick word with our competitors…

Benjamin “Coach” Wade: As the Noble Knight and the Exiled King regroup and move back to the castle and barricade the walls, fill up the moat and lick our cursed wounds after a thorough drumming last week from the “Truth” Seeker. Time to get back in the game and back to war.

Randy Bailey: No comment on last week’s results except that karma can be a bitch.

And before we start this week’s contest, let’s honor the most recent castaway…

coach

Coach’s Requiem for Tyrone: Wow, what a shocker. It’s incredible how things can turn on a dime. Was Tyrone like that in the beginning and we just didn’t get to see that side of him, or was it the “not me” syndrome from the rest of the tribe? I can’t believe that Dan is still in there but hey, stranger things happen. As for the NaOnka/Alina alliance…politics makes strange bedfellows and boy is it political out there on the island.

Sigh, but alas, I digress. To Tyrone: Big, strong, calm, a leader, rational…hey that’s why they do the switch. And I’m not buying the chicken thing. You just reach in there and break off a piece. His relentless picking at the same bone is not fooling me. I think that’s just a decoy for the earlier soft guy that we saw.

The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Gonna miss Tyrone, but just like always we see people taking out physical threats way too early and simply ignoring the dead weight.  Why should this season be different than the previous 20?

TEAM DRAGON SLAYER

Current Score: 49

TEAM TRUTH SEEKER

Current Score: 53
brenda .. chase
#1: Kickin’ ass in challenges, finding the immunity idol, flirting with the guys, I think she will start making more power moves in the future. She’s steppin’ up (and hopefully not steppin’ out).
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Her edit showed a hint of cocky which means she will see Halloween but not Thanksgiving.		 #1: He’s a cornerstone of the Minority Majority alliance, he’s the strongest guy on Espada, he’s clearly on NaOnka’s good side. He’s doing just fine.
chase . brenda
#2: See Benry’s comment below. Are you all in?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: His emotional story to NaOnka had only one purpose…get the viewer to like him…first hint of a possible winner.		 #2: I think Brenda is the most dangerous player this season. She saw right though Marty’s idol unveiling. She’s still my pick to win the whole thing. Her main problem could be her alliance realizing how smart and cunning she is.
sash . benry
#3: You look like every episode you are chillin’ on the beach without a care in the world. A wry smile and a non-threatening posture is getting you deep into the game.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: You have been dealt a perfect hand.  Now let’s see if you know how to play it.		 #3: Benry finally getting some face time. Nice to see him step up, too.  It looks like we’re heading into a youngster-heavy merge. It’ll be interesting to see how the dynamics work out now that they’ve been apart for a while.
fabio . alina
#4: I think you are just dumb enough to not make alliances and not be a threat. Good strategy whether it’s intentional or not. 🙂
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I said before this guy reminds me of Matty from Gabon.  I think he will have a similar outcome…late jury.		 #4: I think the swap worked out best from Alina. She went from being NaOnka’s punching bag to being her shoulder to cry on.
benry . kellys
#5: Keep it up. Just don’t go too strong in the immunity challenges to show your hand yet. You remind me of a good poker player.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I like this guy more than I thought I would.		 #5: Purple Kelly Purple, you’re the best. I don’t know what you’re the best at, cause we never see you, but I adore you.
jane . sash
#6: Given the young ones the scoop on Marty the Mamba. Good one. That will lock in a vote or too. You might be on track to win this thing keeping in the middle like you are doing.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Saw some signs of the edit making her out to be more valuable than she really is…this means she is going deep.		 #6: What’s the BBNY (Biggest Bachelor in New York) been up to? For someone who wants to be the next Russell Hantz, he sure does play under the radar.
kellys . naonka
#7: Just hangin’ in the middle. I think I didn’t give you enough credit the first go around. Is this another Natalie White?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Coach and I first fill in our list from the bottom and then from the top.  We had everyone assigned a position but we were missing one.  We could not think of Kelly Purple.  This is a very good sign to last a long, long time.		 #7: I’m not going to lie, it went against every natural instinct I’ve ever had to feel bad for NaOnka last week. I’m sure she’ll be fine, but quitting talk can raise your alliance mates’ eyebrows.
alina . fabio
#8: Strange bedfellows…hmmm. But I think you are going to snap one of these days on NaOnka when the time is right!
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: You seem way too normal for this game.  How did you get by casting?		 #8: Do we have any idea where Fabio allegiances lie right now? I was under the assumption that he was on the outside of the Minority Majority alliance. Have we seen him partnering with anyone?
holly . holly
#9: “You remind me of my sons, Tyrone reminds me of my great grandfather, King reminds me of my older brother.” Not faulting you for trying that line but were Benry and Chase really buyin’ that one?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I liked you better when you were nuts.  Again, what are they not showing us?		 #9: Holly turned the swap to her advantage by becoming a swing vote. Smart move. And with Dan and Yve below her on the totem pole, she could hit the merge and coast for a while.
naonka . kellyb
#10: I think you are safe as long as you don’t quit. Of course Holly looked like she was going to quit when Jimmy J. was the hero for an episode.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: No squeaking noises this week, wtf?		 #10: It’s my instinct to think she’s safe because NaOnka was swapped to Espada…but is she? Have we seen her buddying up to anyone besides Alina?
yve . jane
#11: You are too quiet in this episode. Use your youthful good looks to sexify the younger guys and relate to the other girls.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Still trying to figure out the spelling of your name.		 #11: I love me some Jane. I hope the youngsters see the value in her spirit and her sense of humor. But if they want to clean up the rest of the pre-merge immunity challenges, they may send her packing.
kellyb . marty
#12: You seem to be even more on the outs with the new tribe. I know they aren’t showing much but you seem to be deflated since NaOnka put the beat down on you. Come on, pick your head up and get back in the game.
King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Na is out of your hair now so let’s see you step up.		 #12: I’d like to think that Marty would never be caught off guard with an immunity idol in his pocket. But it’s happened several times before…
jill . dan
#13: The queen will follow the king and will not relate to the younger kids. Fabio will be the key swing vote for the vote.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Lucky you have Marty in front of you…let’s see if you can dance out of his shadow before it is too late.		 #13: I give Dan all the credit in the world for being able to stay in this game, but there has to come a point where Espada needs to win some challenges.
marty . jill
#14: You are starting to overplay things. The saying goes “too much of a good thing” can be a bad thing.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Unfortunately you were cast on a season of “Survivor” with a double-digit number (like me) you must throw away your playbook if you have any chance.		 #14: The younger part of La Flor knows Marty has an immunity idol, and with Jane they have the numbers to split the vote. That’s bad news for Jill, which is a shame because I think she played a solid game.
dan . yve
#15: You are like a dingleberry that just keeps clingin’ on. Let go already.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Would have liked to have seen you on a real season with real challenges.		 #15: Everyone voted for Tyrone except for Yve. That can’t be good. Her only hope may be winning the individual immunity challenge.

Quick Note: Follow Gordon on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news and updates.

What Do You Think: Who’s going to win this round; Team Dragon Slayer or Team Truth Seeker? Which two players are going home next? Do you miss the Medallion of Power?

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‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 3

October 5, 2010

The Rules: Each week, “Survivor: Tocantins” and “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” star Benjamin “Coach” Wade and XFINITY TV’s “Survivor” recapper Gordon Holmes will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 10 points and Gordon will receive 4 points. At the end of the season, the person or team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Marty made it so the only way you can see Jimmy Johnson is on Sunday afternoons on Fox. Coach and “The King of Gabon” Randy Bailey picked it perfectly, having Jimmy J. in spot 18. Gordon wasn’t far off as he had him in spot 16.

Now, let’s have a quick word with our two competitors…

Gordon Holmes: How are you feeling about the game so far?
Benjamin “Coach” Wade: King and I both feel a flip flop is comin’. King keeps telling me this is reminiscent of Gabon. Let the games begin.
Gordon: I hope they’re careful with that. They did two swaps in Gabon and it really messed up a lot of strategies.

And before we start this week’s contest, let’s honor the most recent castaway…

coach

Coach’s Requiem for Jimmy Johnson: Tell the truth and the truth shall set you FREE!  Okay, so now I gotta tell the truth. For the first time ever the Dragon Slayer wants to be an assistant coach. Jimmy can I play “Survivor” with you and be your A.C.??? I really loved watching Jimmy J. and the truth is (for selfish reasons and to leave the COACH legacy) I only wanted one Coach to leave their mark on the game. And yes, that would be me.

The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: If there are gonna be celebrities on “Survivor”, then have an entire cast of celebrities. There is no place in “Survivor” to have only one celebrity.

TEAM DRAGON SLAYER

Current Score: 30

TEAM TRUTH SEEKER

Current Score: 22
chase .. jill
#1: Totally safe. Not here or there so I know he’s going far. I wonder how much he had to pay to get the Hendrick’s logo approved on his hat!
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Only #1 not for “power” but because he’s not goin’ anywhere.		 #1: Marty’s the one making the moves, but Jill is pulling the strings. I like this strategy, because if the rest of Espada turns on them, they’ll target Marty instead of her.
kellys . brenda
#2: See above notes (minus the Hendrick’s logo).
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: No game is a good game at this point.		 #2: Brenda is like the La Flor version of Jill. If somehow they manage to lose control of the numbers, the first person picked off will be NaOnka (because she’s crazy) or Sash (because he seems to be in control).
jill . tyrone
#3: The brains behind the operation, that much is becoming clear. If she and Marty stay teamed up I think she can tame his egotistical side and he can put his neck on the line and stay out in front.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Still lookin’ good, don’t get too close to Marty the Mamba.		 #3: It looks like he and Marty are having a bit of a power struggle, and right now that’s a struggle Tyrone won’t win. The only thing keeping Tyrone safe right now is the fact that Espada can’t risk losing someone who’s good at challenges.
fabio . sash
#4: Lovin’ this guy. You want the other contestants to respect you for your “mentality.” Oh yeah, that’s it. A mentality of too many hits on the crack pipe, maybe. I bet the scenes on the cutting room floor are classic gold.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Still waiting for something intelligent to come out of your mouth but you are getting the people’s vote.		 #4: Not much from the Biggest Bachelor in NY last week. However, if Kelly Purple Kelly’s proclamation that she only trusts the Minority Majority alliance rings true, then he should be safe for a while.
yve . kellys
#5: YEAH! Finally we get to hear you talk.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I like your game play but your forehead is too big.		 #5: A lot of people are asking; why is Purple Kelly Purple in the Minority Majority alliance? How many people do you think have purple hair? It’s not a whole lot. Therefore, she’s a minority.
benry . chase
#6: You are either the hero or the goat takin’ on a challenge like that. Your stock just went up in my book…again.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I like what I see, but someone who uses a conjunction for his name must have issues.		 #6: Is Chase a favorite to win? No. Is he safe for the time being? Definitely. Is his “Cowboy Up” belt buckle (pictured above) twelve shades of awesome? Totally.
jane . marty
#7: A total redneck with brains. Are you JT’s aunt?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: You are the older country crazy woman that we see every season…except you are missin’ the crazy.		 #7: I’m not a big fan of Marty’s move to dump Jimmy J. I think it’s better to keep easy boots around just in case you find your own head on the chopping block.
brenda . benry
#8: Beware of NaOnka the Nutjob. She’ll kick your ass if you cross her.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Not going anywhere with NaOnka as your forefield.		 #8: Benry needed some challenge magic after the youngsters dropped the Hay Mate challenge, and it looks like he came through with the sandbags. Probably didn’t hurt that he didn’t have someone like Jimmy T. constantly yelling at him to get out of the game.
kellyb . yve
#9: You gotta admit you did go for the clue too. Wish you would have gotten it. If she messes with your leg you better beat her over the head with it.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Please friend request me on Facebook.		 #9: I still can’t get a good grip on where Yve stands within Espada. She seemed genuinely upset that Jimmy J. was going, but wasn’t shown doing anything to try to prevent it. I’m reserving judgment.
sash . fabio
#10: Have you talked to Spencer lately? You are not foolin’ me.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I’ve placed a call to my great friend and foremost celebrity expert on all things NY AND all things homosexual: Mr. Charlie Herschel. He has not responded yet, but tune in next week.		 #10: Fabio’s had a rough couple of weeks. His socks were stolen, he was given a bizarre nickname, his beloved St. Louis Cardinals didn’t make it to the playoffs. Hopefully once the Minority Majority can afford to shed some people they’ll boot NaOnka.
naonka . dan
#11: Wow. I know everyone is kickin’ your ass in the blogs, but being devil’s advocate, she’s like the new Russell, where every confessional is reality gold. You always have to have someone to hate and gurl…this is it!
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: I love it when she squeaks, she sounds like a dog chew toy.		 #11: Marty must have plans for Dan. If he didn’t, why would he boot Jimmy J. first? If he’d bounced super-slow Dan last round, he’d still have the numbers to get rid of Jimmy J. the next time they lose immunity.
holly . holly
#12: It’s only a matter of time.
King of Gabon’s Two Cents: What are the editors not showing us? One week you are bat (expletive deleted) crazy the next week you are playing a great game.		 #12: I’ve got to be honest, I’m not comfortable living in a world where Kel was voted out of “Survivor: The Australian Outback” because he possibly, maybe, could’ve-had beef jerky and Holly sticks around after totally, definitely, without-a-doubt sinking Dan’s shoes.
marty . kellyb
#13: I love it that you are playing the game hard early…BUT…I see a showdown between you and Tyrone coming in the near future. It’s the Dragon and the Dragon Slayer round 2.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Very cerebral, making the right moves, no flaws in your game, no way you will last.		 #13: Everyone’s giving NaOnka grief for pushing Kelly B. down. I disagree. Kelly wants to be treated like everyone else. Part of being like everyone else is being pushed around by NaOnka. But, if she needs to play the victim to stay in the game, I say play the victim.
tyrone . naonka
#14: See above notes on Marty. P.S.: Look ‘em in the eye when he talks to you.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Still looking good, look out if the tribes switch up like we did in Gabon. You are toast.		 #14: I remember before “Survivor: Gabon” I thought, “Man, America is going to fall in love with G-C.” Boy, was I wrong. I thought the same thing about NaOnka. Something about the game must mess with some players’ heads.
alina . jimmyt
#15: You are clearly on the outs with your tribe. Pray for the merge.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: The edit totally shows you are in big, big trouble, therefore I know you are safe this week.		 #15: I’m not sure how heated the exchange got between Tyrone and Marty last week. But, if Marty wants to keep Tyrone happy, we could see Jimmy T. joining Jimmy J. on the bench should Espada lose the next immunity challenge.
jimmyt . alina
#16: Put me in, Coach.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Coach Jimmy is gone, now we can see how much game you really have.		 #16: Alina’s gotta be the dead woman walking at the La Flor camp. But, if Jill could find the immunity idol with one clue, maybe Alina can too. That (or a tribe swap) might be her only hope.
dan . jane
#17: This game can bring you to your knees physically. Dan is starting to crumble. I don’t doubt that you have upper body strength so you better hope for a weight-lifting challenge for you to stay in the game.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: “Dude got ailments.”		 #17: I love Jane. But the facts are Espada is a weak tribe that doesn’t have the Medallion of Power. If they keep losing challenges, the target on her back is going to get bigger and bigger.

Quick Note: Follow Gordon on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news and updates.

What Do You Think: Who’s going to win this round; Team Dragon Slayer or Team Truth Seeker? Who do you think is going home next? Is it fair to have two legendary Villains teaming up against one mildly amusing writer?

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‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 2

September 28, 2010

The Rules: Each week our two combatants will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 8 points and Gordon will receive 5 points. At the end of the season, the team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Shannon Elkins’s bizarre Tribal Council helped propel Team Dragon Slayer to a six point lead. Coach had Mr. Elkins in spot twelve while Gordon had him in spot six.

Now, let’s have a quick word with our two competitors…

Benjamin “Coach” Wade: I am going to continue to enlist the help of the King of Gabon (Randy Bailey). I have relegated him to only chiming in with one or two words but I think you will like what he has to contribute!
Gordon Holmes: I feel like there’s an alliance forming against me.

And before we start this week’s contest, let’s honor the most recent castaway with a new Power Rankings segment…coachrequiem

Coach’s Requiem: Shannon, I wish that you hadn’t been such a miter saw in Tribal Council. I liked your strong-to-the-end method but there is only one Slayer, my friend.

The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Boo, James, Russell, Who Dat. Tool Shed!

TEAM DRAGON SLAYER

Current Score: 12

TEAM TRUTH SEEKER

Current Score: 6
tyrone .. tyrone
#1: The man begins to speak and it is with humor, wisdom and courage.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Shaft!		 #1: He’s strong, he’s smart, he’s keeping his head down in a crazy tribe – Tyrone is playing things just right. His next step is to find a solid alliance (Marty and Jill?) to help take the heat off of him once they hit mergeville.
brenda . marty
#2: Not only is she flirty and sexy, now she starts to make power moves! My dream woman…doesn’t she kayak or paddleboard too? Helping to turn the tribe around so that crescent wrench would be voted out was brilliant.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Lucy Liu!		 #2: In Marty’s favor: He’s building alliances with the few sane people in Espada and he’s got the game’s first immunity idol. Working against Marty: He kind of reminds me of Keith Famie from “Survivor: The Australian Outback.” Anyone else getting that vibe?
marty . brenda
#3: A little power hungry and Gordon Gekko-like when he found the idol. “I found the idol (big eyes) I mean WE found the idol.” Give me a break. Be careful; Plato said that “The measure of a man is what he does with power.” Nevertheless, I think he is smart enough to stay under the radar and savvy enough to herd the sheep.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Randy wannabe.		 #3: Every week Brenda makes me feel stupid for underestimating her. I’m going to keep going back to how she worked Chase. She didn’t say “Let’s get rid of Shannon.” She said, “Why do you need Shannon?” Totally put the ball in his court. Genius.
fabio . chase
#4: Ridiculous to a tee, this guy is pure entertainment. I love the hair flips, the “duh” looks and everything else that goes along with his 100 I.Q. However the true brilliance goes to his tribemates that nicknamed him Fabio… PERFECT!
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Good ta see ya, Matty.		 #4: Chase, you’re not high on this list because I think you and Brenda are solid. (In fact, I’ve yet to see anything that shows me she’s into you at all.) You’re here because La Flor can’t afford to give up any of their strong guys now that Shannon is gone.
yve . sash
#5: Not sure about the edit so far. No confessionals yet which means she is either very boring or very safe. I pick the latter.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Yawn (But that’s how you win nowadays).		 #5: The Biggest Bachelor in New York has to be liking his place in the game right now. He’s got a dominant alliance within a majority alliance…and it’s made of minorities. (OK, I confused myself.)  He has to be careful not to let the others in on what’s really going on or he could find himself headed back to the Big Apple.
kellyb . jill
#6: Really starting to love this girl. She kicked ass in the challenge, hasn’t used her leg as an excuse for anything and is starting to emerge as a player.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Time to put a beat down on NaOnka. I’m tired of her trash talkin’.		 #6: Jill’s my vote for the most dangerous player in the game right now. If Espada heads into the merge with the numbers she’s golden. If they don’t, she’s the last person the youngsters would view as a threat.
benry . yve
#7: Even though you are not being shown, I can feel you safe and tucked away under my dragon wing. Watch out everyone, he’s flyin’ so low he’s buzzin’ the “Survivor” trees.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Douchag (not a typo).		 #7: Still don’t know what to think of Yve. But seeing as she’s yet to submarine anyone’s shoes or have a fit over not being listened to, I’m going to assume she’s safe for the time being.
sash . benry
#8: Minority alliance…clever, Mr. Ladies Man. The question is, just how snakey are you going to get now that your snake is in foreign territory?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Two people arguing at Tribal Council; one is a confirmed idiot; therefore the other one must be an idiot. (I know, I should talk.)		 #8: So…whose side was Benry on? He seemed to be down with Shannon’s Alpha Male alliance, but he voted with Team Brenda. Verdict is still out on him.
chase . kellys
#9: Now that your girlfriend is saved better watch out and separate (not that I’m jealous or anything).
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Thank you for getting rid of that Louisiana (expletive deleted).  Where were you for 19 and 20?		 #9: Purple Kelly, Kelly Purple, whatever they call her has booked a flight on the Under-the-Radar Express.
Some people may hate that strategy, but far too many under-the-radar players have walked out of this game with a million-dollar check to dismiss it.
jane . kellyb
#10: Gotta come out with some more survival techniques to keep you off the chopping block. Not that you have to worry with Jimmy T and Kooky Bird Holly on your tribe.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Nice start.		 #10: I think Kelly B. made a mistake at last week’s Tribal Council. She was very quick to speak up and say how much she trusted Shannon during his meltdown. Will this come back to bite her? I hope not, I think she’s adorable.
kellys . jane
#11: Growin’ on me. You are cute enough to be another Natalie White.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Reminds me of Jess from “Big Brother 8.”		 #11: Jane will be fine…for now. There are way too many issues around Espada right now between the Holly vs. Dan feud and the JimmyX2 feud. But if Espada starts dropping challenges to the young bucks Jane’s days will be numbered.
jill . fabio
#12: Still not sure about you yet. You are on a tribe full of loons and buffoons so you are safe for now. I think you could go far unless there is a tribal switch and you end up on the wrong side.
King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Doctors never win. Good luck.		 #12: Poor, Fabio. His main alliance member spontaneously combusted while NaOnka is hating on him for having the audacity to be upset with her for stealing his socks. He’ll be fine though, I’m sure La Flor is on his side when it comes to Sock-gate.
alina . jimmyt
#13: On the outs, gotta dodge and weave and bring in some bad-ass woman power. Get in with the girls cause the guys aren’t goin’ for you.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: WHO? (Read above comment for Yve.)		 #13: “Jerry, Hello!” You’d think a super fan of “Survivor” wouldn’t make the mistakes Jimmy T. has been making. We didn’t see much of him last week, but they did hammer home that the Jimmy Feud is still very much alive. If it goes down, I still see T. prevailing over J., but only cause T.’s more useful in challenges.
dan . dan
#14: An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. I’m waitin’ for you to open up a can on that crazy hoot Holly for stealin’ those shoes. I like your style.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Guido.		 #14: Prediction: The man with the $1,600 shoes becomes “Survivor’s” sole survivor and buys a million-dollar pair of pants with his winnings. Yeah, probably not.
jimmyt . naonka
#15: Such a character. I love it and I hope you stay but you gotta tone it down a little. Start wearin’ your hair in a samurai knot, it will help you think better.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: America’s vote my fat, flat, flabby ass.		 #15: NaOnka is basically throwing her game away over a pair of socks. Seriously, just tell Fabio the socks are haunted and I’m sure he’ll hand them right over.
holly . jimmyj
#16: And I thought Crazy Sandy was crazy. Holly, you are giving coaches a bad name here. Pull up your bootstraps and act normal for cryin’ out loud.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: OMG.		 #16: Does Jimmy J. actually have any allies within Espada? It was nice to see him bring Holly back around last week, but have we actually seen him form any really strong bonds? That, and if Espada starts losing challenges he doesn’t bring much to the table as far as physical prowess.
naonka . alina
#17: Awesome entertainment, if you like that sleazy kind of evil manipulation and trash talkin’. Quite possibly the lowest line ever “I’m gonna punch that girl so hard her leg is going to fall off.” How low can you go, baby?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Starting to love her but won’t have much more time!		 #17: “Oh, Johnny. Did you back the wrong horse.” Dr. Peter Venkman – “Ghostbusters II”

Yeah, I quoted “Ghostbusters II.” Wanna make something of it?
jimmyj . holly
#18: His snowballin’ isn’t stonewallin’ the Dragon Slayer. I’m not buyin’ his pep talks and although I could never coach like him in the NFL there is ONLY ONE COACH ON “SURVIVOR.”
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: “No jury is ever gonna vote for me to win. I know that.” J.J., you’re not gonna get close to any jury.		 #18: In honor of Coach agreeing to be my Power Rankings competition, I had the players come up with their own “Survivor” nicknames. Holly chose “Hollywood.” I think it’s accurate because she’s stopped eating and she’s lost her mind.

What Do You Think: Who’s going to win this round; Team Dragon Slayer or Team Truth Seeker? Would you pay $1,600 for shoes? Is there room for more than one Coach on “Survivor”?

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‘Survivor’ Castaway Interview: Randy Bailey

February 26, 2010

Randy Bailey might be one of the most misunderstood players in “Survivor” history. In Gabon he was portrayed as an angry, old hermit when he was actually forging lasting friendships with Corinne Kaplan, Charlie Herschel, Matty Whitmore, and others.

In last night’s episode, Randy was shown as a contributing member of his tribe. He attempted to feed his fellow Villains, offering the clam he’d found to everyone in the shelter. It was only when he was alone with the camera that he would show his true disdain for his tribe mates.

Fortunately for us, Randy also shows his disdain during exit interviews. I had a chance to chat with Randy the morning after he was voted out of “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” and get his no-holds-barred thoughts on Coach’s touching tribute, Boston Rob’s leadership style, and Russell’s machete-hiding antics.

Gordon Holmes: Randy…too soon.
Randy Bailey: Tell me about it.
Gordon: So, tell me. What happened out there? Were you having trouble making inroads with the rest of the tribe?
Randy: I had some friends in our tribe from before we even started. Me, Tyson, and Coach…I knew almost everybody. But, it’s the oldest story known to man, (slang for female body parts deleted) rule.
Gordon: I’m not going to debate that policy.
Randy: I can live with it. I have to live with it.

Gordon: The Villains tribe has been having trouble getting things done around camp. It seems like Boston Rob is the only one working. Is that an accurate portrayal?
Randy: The people working; Boston Rob, Tyson, Coach, and myself put the shelters, and I said “shelters,” together on our own. The girls…Sandra and Jerri worked. The three girls Danielle, Parvati, and Courtney don’t do anything except work on their sun tan. Boston Rob was not working any harder than the other people that I mentioned. He was just frustrated because people…I mean…we’re not Amber. We’re not going to just say, “You’re right, King Rob.”

Gordon: How did the tribe feel about Russell? Were there any clues to the depths to which he would stoop?
Randy: No, we had not seen one second of season nineteen, so we had no clue what a dirt bag he was. We’d be working around camp and ten minutes later we’d be like, “Where’s Russell?” And Russell would be off making deals with girls or looking for idols in the same places where he found them in season nineteen. We figured out pretty quickly that he was up to something, but we didn’t know to what extent. If we’d watched fifteen minutes of the first episode of season nineteen you’d be talking to him right now instead of me.

Gordon: Was there any idea that he was responsible for the missing machete?
Randy: No, I just thought it was misplaced. The machete disappearing had nothing to do with me being voted off. Russell hiding the machete is just Russell’s way of getting more air time.
Gordon: Is that a line you wouldn’t cross, or is all fair in love and “Survivor?”
Randy: All’s fair in the game now. Eight, nine, ten years ago in Borneo, Australia, the first Africa that’s not the way the game was played. I’d never do something like that. It was frustrating when they accused me of it, but I told them several times I didn’t do it. I have friends left in the game and I don’t want them to starve to death. And they’d just kept bringing it up. Sandra and Danielle were like, “C’mon and tell us where it is, Randy.” And I’m just like, “Shut up.”
Gordon: (Laughs)
Randy: But the machete had nothing to do with me being voted out. It just gave Russell some more air time.

Gordon: Coach gave a very passionate speech on your behalf. Did you have any idea that Coach’s emotions ran so deep?
Randy: Yeah, watching that I hit the pause button. I was touched, it brought tears to my eyes. Coach and I have been good friends since and I didn’t doubt him for a second. I knew he was fighting for me, but I liked that scene.
Gordon: Do you know if Coach has decided what he’s going to do with the Oscar he’s sure to pick up for Best Passionate Speech?
Randy: I don’t know, I hope if there’s any money involved that he splits it with me. But that wasn’t acting, Coach is a loyal guy. And believe it or not, I think his stories are for the most part true. I’m a Coach fan.
Gordon: Did you get any poetry when you were out there?
Randy: (Laughs) No, he didn’t read us any poetry, just gave us bedtime stories. And that wasn’t Coach, that was Boston Rob saying, “Tell us another story.”
Gordon: Do you think Boston Rob was doing that so he could play Coach off as a fool later?
Randy: Probably not. I’ve got my issues with Boston Rob, but I think we were just killing time and Coach’s stories are entertaining and funny. And when you’re lying in a hut with a bunch of morons you’ll do anything to pass the time.

Gordon: Now I was warned beforehand that you were grossing people out earlier. And frankly I’m a little disappointed that this interview has been relatively free of gross-out moments.
Randy: I’ve been under the weather since my trip to the South Pacific. And, I went into some detail before. So, I’ve been told not to tell you about my massive diarrhea.
Gordon: Last time we spoke you went into detail about the “Diamond-hard rock pellets” that were covering your colon in Gabon.
Randy: This was the exact opposite of that.

Gordon: Did you and Sugar have a chance to patch things up at the Ponderosa?
Randy: There’s nothing to patch up. We’re just two different people. She was as cordial to me as I was to her. The last thing you want to do when you come out of a game like this is to continue it.

Gordon: Alright, let’s do some word association.
Randy: Oh no, you’re the word-association guy. I told myself for two weeks that I was going to prep for this, but I’m going in totally unprepared.
Gordon: I have faith in you. Let’s start with Sandra.
Randy: Floater.
Gordon: Courtney?
Randy: Caustic.
Gordon: James?
Randy: Simple.
Gordon: The bro-mance between Boston Rob and Jeff Probst?
Randy: Nauseating.
Gordon: Jerri?
Randy: Surprisingly fun.
Gordon: Coach?
Randy: Friend.
Gordon: Russell?
Randy: Midget.
Gordon: See, that wasn’t so bad.
Randy: You didn’t give me Rob! That was the one I practiced on.
Gordon: OK, Boston Rob?
Randy: (Expletive deleted)

Gordon: Last night after you were voted out you took the Villains buff off of your head and threw it into the fire. What motivated you to do that?
Randy: Actually, there were many meanings behind that. If you see the clip of us walking to tribal council I’m not even wearing a buff. I got in trouble for not wearing a buff, so they scrambled to find me one. And the producers lecture me, “Take care of these buffs cause we don’t have that many of them.”  So, it seemed like the thing to do to throw it in the fire. And then it has the symbolism to say, “To hell with this, to hell with this tribe, to hell with this game.”

More “Survivor” Fun: Check out my Episode Three Recap and the latest blogs from “Survivor: The Amazon” winner Jenna Morasca.

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