Posts Tagged ‘kelly bruno’

‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 12

December 15, 2010

The Rules: Each week, “Survivor: Tocantins” and “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” star Benjamin “Coach” Wade and XFINITY TV’s “Survivor” recapper Gordon Holmes will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Fabio is voted out this week, Coach will receive two points and Gordon will receive four. At the end of the season, the person or team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Team Dragon Slayer called it. Coach had Benry in spot seven while had him in spot six. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 132, Team Truth Seeker 134.


Ode to Benry:
Should’ve goldbricked it in the challenges. But I was glad to see your character emerge as the season went on.


Current Score: 132


Current Score: 134

sash .. sash
#1: He’s got the idol, he’s playing both sides – although that’s a dangerous way to play as I found out in “Heroes vs. Villains.” He’s always thinking about the game. He’s not going to quit. #1: OK, Sash. It’s your time to shine. If you want to walk away with the million dollars you have to make your move this week. You need to get rid of Holly and Jane. And you need to do it in a way that makes them not hate you. It’s this week that’ll show if you’re Todd Herzog (a winner) or Russell Hantz (a runner-up).
fabio . chase
#2: His stupidity is becoming brilliant and he’s becoming smarter the more he is immersed in the game. #2: Chase has got to be a lock for the final three. Everybody likes him, but nobody respects his gameplay.
dan . dan
#3: I can’t say that he’s growing on me. But I see another Sandra (Diaz-Twine) and depending on who gets to the end he might win it because he hasn’t pissed anybody off. #3: Yeah Dan, you’re still safe. And you might be a good pick to take to the final three too. Why would anyone be threatened by you? You’re just a pleasant paper weight at this point.
chase . fabio
#4: He’s a scared little rabbit. I think people think they can manipulate him and he’s not a threat. He’s a paper tiger. He’s like James (Clement) in “Heroes vs. Villains.” #4: The only thing keeping Fabio safe at this point is the fact that Holly and Jane are more likely to get final votes. Which is good, cause I’m a member of Team Fabs.
holly . jane
#5: Her coaching personality is coming out. She’s one of my favorite characters this season going from wanting to quit and not being able to handle it to trying to help other people not to quit. Giving up her reward was very chivalrous, but unfortunately that’s going to come back to bite her. #5: This was a tough one between Jane and Holly. But in the end, I think Holly is better liked by the jury and Jane is more likely to win immunity. People like NaOnka and Alina have been looking at her as a Mom figure for a while. So, we’ll have fish dances until the finale.
jane . holly
#6: I just think Marty’s comment is going to resonate with everyone. “If she gets to the end, I’ll vote for her and you guys are the stupidest group ever.” So, if she doesn’t win immunity, I think she’s going home. #6: It’s been an interesting run for you, Holly. Not many people go from crazed villain to mother figure in one season. But, I think you’ll be able to look back at this season and be proud of how you’ve performed.

‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Episode 11 Recap: Most Shocking Tribal Council Ever?

December 1, 2010

Last Episode: NaOnka made a gamble and turned on her friend, while Brenda refused to scramble and her game met its end.

Tonight: Jeff Probst has promised us a great episode and the previews hinted at the most shocking Tribal Council ever. Oh, we shall see…

39 Days, 20 People, 1 ‘Survivor‘ Blog

Here is the tribe as it currently stands…

The Libertad Tribe (wearing red with vibrant white highlights)
•    Benry – 24, Club Promoter
•    Chase – 24, Race Car Jackman/Country Singer
•    Dan – 63, Real Estate Executive
•    Fabio – 21, Student
•    Holly – 44, Swim Coach
•    Jane – 56, Dog Trainer
•    Kelly S. – 20, Nursing Student
•    NaOnka – 27, P.E. Teacher
•    Sash – 30, Real Estate Broker

Note: Voting for the ‘Survivor’ Hall of Fame ends Friday at 5 p.m. ET. If you’ve yet to vote, or if you’ve voted and feel strongly about voting again, swing over and let your voice be heard.

A rough sky greets the Libertonians after Tribal Council. Purple Kelly discovers the ability to talk and lets us know that she was completely left in the dark about the Brenda vote.

Holly explains ‘Survivor’ 101 to NaOnka, telling her that the moves she had made could be construed as stabbing Brenda in the back. Ya know, cause she totally did.

Chase lets us know that his new alliance consists of him, Jane (fish hoarder), Holly (shoe sinker), and NaOnka (sock/flour/cookware stealer, one-legged-woman assaulter). Good luck with that, Chase.

The next morning the Libertatians are understandably freaked out as the rain has turned their pond into a mudslide.

NaOnka is having a rough time dealing with the weather as it is apparently very rough on her joints. Kelly Purple is having trouble with the rain too.

Sing it with me folks… “Purple Rain…Purple Rain…”

Later that day NaOnka and Chase discuss her quitting again. NaOnka shows how serious she is about tapping out by handing her hidden immunity idol over to Chase. Chase lets us know that even if she stays in the game, he’s holding onto the idol.

Jane goes over the numbers, apparently Sash will be the fourth member of their alliance if NaOnka quits. However, Sash trusts Purple Kelly and NaOnka more than he trusts Team Holly. (Seriously? After NaOnka went after Brenda?)

Reward Challenge: The tribe will be split into two teams. They’ll also be tethered to each other. Each team will have to untie an eight-foot dummy named Gulliver (that looks suspiciously like Jack Black). They’ll then have to carry the dummy over a series of obstacles. The first team to cross the finish line wins a trip to ‘Survivor’ Cinema where they’ll watch a preview of ‘Gulliver’s Travels’ and enjoy popcorn and other theater snacks.

Gulliver’s Travels‘ coming to a theater near you December 22, 2010.

J-Pro then gives an inspiring speech about how they’ve come this far, and Goonies never say die, and a couple of other clichés. Sweep the leg, Johnny.

After a school-yard pick, the yellow team will be Fabio, Sash, Jane, and Purple Kelly while the blue team will be Holly, NaOnka, Chase, and Benry. Dan wasn’t selected (SHOCKER!) so he’ll sit in a comically large chair and root for the blue team. If the blue team wins, he gets to tag along for movie night.

The yellow team frees their Jack Black first, but the blue team is only slightly behind them.

Note: Is this the first time Jack Black has been on TV without singing?

The blue team falls behind for a bit, but Benry powers them into the lead.

A rope wall proves troublesome for the blue folks as team yellow sneaks back ahead (while dragging Jane).

Another Note: Probst says “Don’t give up” like a dozen times during this challenge. It’s like he’s trying to subliminally get into NaOnka and Kelly’s heads.

The blue team manages to regain the lead during the final obstacle and wins the challenge and the reward.

During the wrap-up, NaOnka tells Jeff that she’s going to call it quits.  Purple Kelly tells him she’ll be throwing in the towel too.

J-Pro doesn’t let them off the hook that easily. He tells them they’ll have to wait until Tribal Council to quit.

Probst also gives the winning team the chance to forgo their reward in exchange for a new tarp and more rice for the tribe. All it takes is one person to sacrifice their reward to earn the items.

Holly takes one for the team and gives up her reward. Benry tries to get NaOnka to give up her reward since she’ll be going home that night anyway. But, that would involve being unselfish which isn’t quite NaOnka’s gimmick.

Back at camp, Holly does her best Jimmy Johnson impersonation and tries to talk Purple Kelly out of quitting. Kelly says that she can’t deal with the rain and the lack of food. Holly counters by saying she just got them more food and a tarp. Touché.

We meet up with the winning team at the ‘Survivor’ Cinema. Chase, Benry, NaOnka, and Dan dive into the food. NaOnka tells us that she didn’t give up the reward because she gave 110% in the challenge.

New Footage Sheds Light on ‘Survivor: Nicaragua’

[iframe—Episode-11/embed 580 476]


Quick Aside: OK, I’m a big believer in all’s fair in love and ‘Survivor,’ but NaOnka might be the devil. You’re leaving the game, why don’t you leave these poor, freezing, starving people with a tarp and rice. Hopefully if she does quit, Probst will stick to the ruling that quitters aren’t invited back. I’d hate to see her return for “Survivor 25: Press vs. Awful Human Beings.”

We’re then treated to some apparently hilarious scenes from ‘Gulliver’s Travels.’

NaOnka claims that the movie put everything in perspective, and that if she stays she can win a million dollars.

No NaOnka, you can’t. You can’t possibly win a million dollars. If you went up in a final three with the 2004 Boston Red Sox and whoever greenlit the Geico ‘Cavemen’ sitcom, you still wouldn’t get my vote.

Tribal Council gets off to an odd start as the winning team comes right from their reward. What if nobody quits? Do they still vote? Although, I do like the idea of an emergency Tribal Council. Nobody puts J-Pro in the corner.

Jeff asks Holly why she didn’t quit. She gives credit to Jimmy Johnson for talking her out of it. I miss me some Jimmy. Damn you, Marty.

NaOnka explains how the weather is wreaking havoc with her joints. Dan isn’t amused. The man has no joints, he’s like a Ken doll!

Kelly Purple Kelly tells Jeff that the weather has been getting the best of her too.

Benry dips into the cliché bin and says “Winners never quit and quitters never win.”

Fabio tells Jeff that he doesn’t care if it starts snowing; he’s going to stay in the game. Go Fabio. I love that kid. (Also, he’s a St. Louis Cardinals fan.)

NaOnka then proves how deluded she is by saying that she thinks she had a shot at winning the game. J-Pro nearly falls over with glee.

Jeff then asks everyone for their thoughts on ‘Gulliver’s Travels.’


NaOnka really seemed to like it, although I can’t see them quoting her in the movie trailers.

Jane then gives the speech of the evening saying how times are tough with the recession and if you don’t have some kind of drive and perseverance, you’re going to be in trouble.

Jeff finally puts the question to NaOnka asking if she’s going to stay or quit. She quits.

Jeff then asks the same question to Purple Kelly, telling her she now has a one-in-eight shot with NaOnka gone. And…she quits.

Probsty asks NaOnka what should happen to her torch now that she’s out. She assumes it will be snuffed (or “smuffed” as she said) like everyone else. Osten from Pearl Islands disagrees.

Probst says he’ll snuff them, but they’ll leave the torches at Tribal as a reminder of their failure. Probst snuffs the torches and sends them on their way. He then leans the torches against a wall and gives the remaining players a pep talk to finish off the show.

What?! They’re not going to lay the torches down?!

Verdict: That was rough to watch. Brenda and Marty looked livid. Poor Alina was in tears.

Good, interesting episode though. But, I have no love for quitters. Of course, that may be easy to say from the comfort of my couch.

And NaOnka may have just replaced Dre “Dreamz” Herd as my least favorite player ever.

Who’s Going to Win? How about Holly? Heroic gestures usually backfire, but she probably won Kelly Purple’s jury vote.

Power Rankings Results: Team Dragon Slayer had NaOnka in spot nine and Purple Kelly in spot seven. I had NaOnka in spot five and Purple Kelly in spot nine. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 125, Team Truth Seeker 128.

Follow me on Twitter for breaking ‘Survivor’ news: @gordonholmes

What Do You Think? Who’s your least favorite Survivor of all time? Should NaOnka and Kelly Purple be allowed to join the jury? Who’s your favorite as we head into the home stretch?


‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Episode 10 Recap – A Campfire …Literally

November 17, 2010

Last Week: Chase sided with the ladies in a hurry, NaOnka unleashed some Tribal Council fury, while Marty was sent down to the jury.

39 Days, 20 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

Here is the tribe as it currently stands…

The Libertad Tribe (wearing red with lovely white highlights)
•    Benry – 24, Club Promoter
•    Brenda – 27, Paddleboard Company Owner
•    Chase – 24, Race Car Jackman/Country Singer
•    Dan – 63, Real Estate Executive
•    Fabio – 21, Student
•    Holly – 44, Swim Coach
•    Jane – 56, Dog Trainer
•    Kelly S. – 20, Nursing Student
•    NaOnka – 27, P.E. Teacher
•    Sash – 30, Real Estate Broker

Quick Note: We’re working with Jeff Probst and the rest of the “Survivor” crew to elect the first class of the “Survivor” Hall of Fame. So, please swing over and vote for your favorite players of all time. Vote early, vote often!

We kick off the show with the Libertadians returning from Tribal Council. Brenda tells us that Benry, Fabio, and the InDanimate Object now know who runs the show. She claims that her and Sash are like the tribe’s king and queen. Except that she’s the king and Sash is the queen.

Somewhere Shannon just giggled.

Meanwhile, Holly’s trying to get Jane to get onboard with an alliance with her, Chase, and NaOnka. Wow…so much crazy in one group!

The next morning, the tribe decides to place their chests and other items around the fire to protect the fire from the rain. I can’t imagine how that could possibly go wrong.

Holly continues rallying the troops, making a play for Benry. They both agree that Sash totally stabbed Marty in the back.

Next we see Jane telling NaOnka Holly’s plan. Jane says that Brenda should go next because she doesn’t like to align with villains. The irony is apparently lost on Jane that she is saying this NaOnka.

Holly’s play for Chase isn’t as successful as Chase doesn’t trust Benry.

Reward Challenge: The teams will do a schoolyard pick to divide into two teams. (Guess they didn’t want to end up guys vs. girls again.) Using four barrels, two planks, and ten feet of rope, the teams will have to build a bridge to make their way across the beach without touching the ground. If one player touches the ground, the entire team has to go back. The first team to reach the platform wins a trip to an active volcano for some volcano boarding, pizza, and brownies.

Note: You know why I like this challenge? Cause they can pretend the sand is lava. I used to play that game all the time as a kid.

Another Note: Probst breaks away from his traditional color scheme and wears a green shirt.

The blue team is Chase, Purple Kelly, NaOnka, Jane, and Fabio while the yellow team is Sash, Holly, Brenda, Dan, and Benry.

The blue team decides to use only three of the four barrels. This strategy helps them get out to a big lead. The yellow team copies this strategy, but meets disaster when they all fall and have to head back to the beginning.

Unfortunately during the fall, Dan smashed his hand. Poor Dan, I’m convinced he had no idea what he was getting into.

The blue team kills this challenge, winning it easily. Benry does a flip off his barrel for fun. JPro calls this the “Loser dismount.”

JPro’s in rare form tonight. Must be his new green shirt.

A helicopter arrives to pick up our winners and give them a tour of a volcano. They enjoy a beautiful view before landing and partaking in some volcano surfing.

Yet Another Note: “Volcano Surfing” is somewhat of a misnomer. It was more like “Volcano Sledding.”

Back at camp, we get a lesson in what happens when you put wood really close to fire. Spoiler Alert: It burns.

The losing half of the reward challenge returns to the ashy aftermath. The chests are gone, the tarp on their shelter has melted away, and the machetes’ handles have burned off. Apparently one of the chests was holding what was left of their food.

Oh man, Colby’s gonna have to trade his Texas flag for a new container of rice.

Meanwhile…on a volcano…Fabio starts talking strategy. NaOnka, in a not-so-subtle move, (not that NaOnka’s known for her subtle moves) takes him aside and fills him in on the anti-Brenda alliance. As a peace offering, she hands him his socks.

Just kidding, she totally kept the socks.

When the winning side returns to camp, Chase makes a beeline to Brenda to give her the scoop. Brenda doesn’t seem very concerned.

NaOnka finds out that Chase talked to Brenda and quickly alerts Jane and Benry. Jane has a theory that Chase has a crush on Brenda.

Somewhere Shannon just giggled again.

Immunity Challenge: Each player will stand on a small platform that’s stationed over the pool that Fabio peed in. (I know, gross.) They’ll each hold onto a rope and lean back. After a while they’ll have to move further down the rope. When a person falls into the water, they’re eliminated. Last person standing (er…leaning) wins immunity.

Seriously? Another Note?: Jeff is back in a blue shirt. Classic Probst.

Not much to describe here except for leaning. Sash, Purple Kelly Purple, Holly, Brenda, Fabio, Dan, and NaOnka are all out before the first period is up. Benry, Jane, and Chase move down to the next knot. All three of them look miserable. Benry drops out first.

Looks like we’ve got Jane and Chase in the Battle of North Carolina.

Jane tells Chase that here fingers are hurting, Chase tells Jane that he’s doing well. Jane tells Probst that she’s going to quit. JPro talks her out of it.

Sweet talker.

The two go at it with Chase eventually falling. Jane wins immunity. Jane later tells us that clipping dog fingernails gives you strong hands. See, learn something new every day.

Politicking around Libertad is once again a case of Benry vs. Brenda.

NaOnka spills the Brenda plan to Sash. Sash tells us that this is the first time he’s felt worried in the game.

Chase tells Brenda that NaOnka is the one gunning for her. However, Brenda isn’t going to scramble because she’s worried her alliance mates will lose faith in her. She then makes a very smart move telling Sash that he will lose all of his numbers if they vote her out. She wants Sash to give her the idol so they can blindside NaOnka.

Sash contemplates giving his idol to Brenda, but NaOnka is convinced that he’ll keep it for himself.

The Mega Powers are exploding! (Sorry, that joke was just for the wrestling fans.)

That night at tribal council, Sash admits that he feels like he’s out of the loop.

Brenda tells Jeff that she regrets voting Marty out. Marty (complete with normal looking hair) nods his approval from the jury booth.

Brenda says she doesn’t have a problem trusting people, because she felt she had the strongest core alliance in the game. She then admits to being shocked that NaOnka would jump ship.

NaOnka could jump out of my TV right now, hide my cookware, smoosh my bananas, and steal my socks and I wouldn’t be shocked.

NaOnka denies that she was going to turn on Brenda. Chase disagrees.

JPro asks Kelly Purple to weigh in on these events with her “twenty years of wisdom.” Excited to speak, the purple one admits to feeling out of the loop for the first time.

Voting Time: Holly votes for Brenda, Brenda votes for NaOnka (and drew a sweet picture of the immunity idol she helped NaOnka find), and the rest of the votes will have to wait for the official reading.

Probsty tallies and returns. He asks if anyone wants to play their idol…and nobody does.

One vote for Brenda, one vote NaOnka, one vote Benry, three votes for Brenda, and the eleventh person voted out of “Survivor: Nicaragua” and the third member of the jury is…Brenda.

Chase and Sash voted for Brenda. Kelly Purple Kelly voted for Benry…guess she was right about being out of the loop.

Verdict: OK, who had Week 10 for the meltdown of the Minority Majority Alliance in the pool? We’ve lost two of our smartest players in back-to-back weeks. Not sure what that means for strategy the rest of the way. I’m just going to keep my fingers crossed that Fabio stays safe.

Who’s Going to Win? Did Sash jump ship early enough to make a difference? Maybe. If NaOnka’s next to go and then they start gunning for physical threats he could make a move.

Power Rankings Results: Team Dragon Slayer and Team Truth Seeker were both way off. Coach had Brenda in spot two, while I had her in spot three. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 109, Team Truth Seeker 114.

Follow me on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news: @gordonholmes

What Do You Think? What did NaOnka do in the preview that has everyone so upset? Who’s the best strategic player left? Is Dan going to waddle his way to the million?


‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 9

November 17, 2010

The Rules: Each week, “Survivor: Tocantins” and “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” star Benjamin “Coach” Wade and XFINITY TV’s “Survivor” recapper Gordon Holmes will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 9 points and Gordon will receive 1 point. At the end of the season, the person or team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Team Dragon Slayer and Team Truth Seeker tied again! They both had Marty in spot eleven. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 107, Team Truth Seeker 111.

Before we get into the battle, let’s check in with our two combatants.

Gordon Holmes: So, as I’m sure you’ve heard…we’re electing the first-ever class into the ‘Survivor’ Hall of Fame. I was interested in your top five. Although, you should know in my role as Senior Chairman of the Executive Voting Committee I can’t let any of your picks sway my vote.
Benjamin ‘Coach’ Wade:
Top 5 Survivors of all time…without question…no debates…Hatch, Hantz, Boston Rob, Rupert, Coach.
Gordon: Interesting.
Coach: Poetry gave me such a sweetness resonating from my senses last week I thought I would do some more, albeit not in Haiku form.
Gordon: Excellent.
Coach: Next week we will compare and give Arthurian Legend nicknames to the remaining members.
Gordon: Then I have some reading to do…


Ode to Marty:
Too smart,
But now we must part,
The game was better for you at the start.


Current Score: 107


Current Score: 111

fabio .. sash
#1: Ladies man, funny pan, no plan is the best plan. #1: While others are arguing over stolen fruit and fish dances, Sash was busy securing Marty’s jury vote. Well done, Sash.
brenda . naonka
#2: Backs might start to turn, as the money in the mind starts to burn, played well so far but lots to learn. #2: I’m done predicting NaOnka’s demise. It’s obvious this woman is bulletproof and everyone wants to go to the final three with her. Should we call this strategy “Hantzing” from now on?
naonka . brenda
#3: Keep giving sound bites, to the producers delights, you never get a vote because everyone of you is in fright. #3: What’s going on here? Are people around Libertad worried about upsetting Brenda? Careful, that kind of stuff can tear alliances apart when there are still swing votes lying around.
dan . kellys
#4: I’ve given up voting against you, your injuries were turning me blue, now I see just how tough you are to stick it through. #4: Kelly Kelly Kelly…I don’t even know what to say about you anymore. Are you going to coast into the finals Natalie White-style, then walk out with the million when nobody wants to vote for Brenda and NaOnka?
kellys . fabio
#5: Week by week you improve your game, silent at first now you are more a name, hope you make it all the way fly low and sane. #5: Fabio, you’re the king. You vote anyway you want, you do whatever you want, you say whatever you want, and everyone still loves you. Now, learn a fake British accent in time for the finale so you can pretend it was all an act.
holly . holly
#6: You wanted to quit once but now you are tough, don’t bail however once it gets rough, keep making friends all around and you have the right stuff. #6: Look at Holly go. She should’ve been outta here on week three. She’s playing the kind of game now that can coast into the finals.
jane . benry
#7: With eyes like Gollum and catching a lot of fish, Marty is out you got your wish, but hopefully in the future you won’t turn out to be the main dish. #7: Oh, Benry. If your plan is to play stupid, you’re in big trouble. Fabio does that way better than you do.
benry . chase
#8: Strength will make you a target, for weak players up the market, and don’t let others get a start up. #8: Chase’s defining moment may very well be how he bet in last week’s reward challenge. A vote for the guys says, “I want to eat.” A vote for the girls says, “I’m playing the game, and I’m siding with them.” The last thing anyone wants is a fit guy who’s playing the game.
sash . dan
#9: Sasha but I’m second from the bottom. Sasha pasha posh. About ready to enter the mosh pit of pride induced slosh. #9: Teflon Dan? Not anymore. By siding with Marty you’ve put a target on your head. And as the InDanimate Object, you’ll probably be very easy to hit.
chase . jane
#10: Insecurities are starting to show, hope this doesn’t mean you will start to blow, but show weakness now and you will be the next to go. #10: You got your way. Marty is long gone. But now what? All of those things Marty said about you being a threat are still out there. Sorry, Jane. Save the last fish dance for me.

Quick Note: Follow Gordon on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news and updates.


What Do You Think: Who’s going to win this round; Team Dragon Slayer or Team Truth Seeker? Will people take NaOnka to the end because she can’t win? Will Fabio spend the million on magic beans?

‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Merge Edition

November 3, 2010

The Rules: Each week, “Survivor: Tocantins” and “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” star Benjamin “Coach” Wade and XFINITY TV’s “Survivor” recapper Gordon Holmes will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 3 points and Gordon will receive 6 points. At the end of the season, the person or team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: The La Flor youngsters decided to keep Marty around again. Good for him, not so good for his buddy Jill. Team Dragon Slayer had Jill in spot thirteen while I had her in spot eleven. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 85, Team Truth Seeker 89.

Special Announcement: The gauntlet has been thrown down; next week the Power Rankings will be done in haiku form. Be prepared.

And before we start this week’s rankings, let’s pay tribute to the recent booted castaway with…


Note: This week I am still on my own, with The King still MIA. APB on Randy Bailey. Someone either give him a job or contact me asap with his whereabouts!

Ode to Jill: You made all the right moves, getting a strong, smart player like Marty in the beginning on your side. You could have been one-two with Marty but alas the “Survivor” Gods would not deem it. The merge sealed your fate and the lines had been drawn. You didn’t get enough airtime to be missed, nor were you a personality that they will bring back, so parting this time is not such sweet sorrow.

Team Dragon Slayer’s Picks:

brenda . chase
#1: In total control. The girls are leaning on you for strength and the guys are eating out of the palm of your hand. Which way can you go? NaOnka, Chase, Sash, your options are unlimited! You go, girl. #2: See Brenda’s entry, except that you are NOT the one in control.
sash . fabio
#3: See Brenda’s line but perhaps you are the one in control? Could be a future battle of backstabbing with the two of you, or an alliance that could make it to the end. #4: This guy is the one to watch. Non threatening, funny, not making enemies. I am picking him to go to the finals.
benry . jane
#5: Very competitive in last week’s challenge. This bodes ill because although you are not making enemies people will start seeing you as a threat. #6: You are starting to get cocky, but not much of a threat. Keep working hard, keep ingratiating yourself with the young’uns and ADAPT at the merge. Do that and you will go far.
kellys . naonka
#7: Your good looks and subtle charms are going to take you to the finals, unless you cross someone. Keep saying “yes” to everyone that comes up to you and asks for an alliance. Play dumb if your cover is blown. #8: Still golden. Still obnoxious. Still class-less. DON’T QUIT ON US.
holly . alina
#9: You have turned your game around completely. You actually look happy out there. Adaptation to the elements is the key in coaching, life, and “Survivor.” See Jane’s comments above, you could be going all the way. #10: You think you’re on the ins but you are really on the outs. Your bitchy, indifferent, placid side will get you ousted sooner than you think.
dan . marty
#11: Your throw in the challenge was pathetic. Seriously? “Survivor” training hint: Stop lifting weights and start doing stretches and running and pilates. Jeez, that was embarrassing. Ever hear the saying “You throw like a girl?” #12: Giving the idol away was brilliant and stupid, all at the same time. My advice to you is to steal it from Sash when he is sleeping. I hope to hell you do some fancy alliance making once the merge comes this week. I’m pulling for ya, Marty! Stay strong.


Team Truth Seeker’s Picks:

brenda . chase
#1: The merge reunites Brenda with her BFFs NaOnka and Chase. She’s in a great slot and should really start thinking about getting on future jurors’ good sides. #2: You’re safe for now, Chasington. But you’re going to be in a world of trouble when your alliance realizes you’re built like Triple H. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised to see you go before Dan does.
benry . dan
#3: A lot of people are against Benry, but he’s starting to grow on me. With Marty on his way out, Benry could become my new pick to take the whole thing.
#4: Dan made a huge jump this week. Now that all the challenges are for individual immunity, I look for him to start racking up the wins. Oh wait, sarcasm doesn’t show up in text. OK, let’s just say there’s no reason to ever vote out Dan because he has the challenge prowess of a topiary plant.
kellys . sash
#5: “Milk your own milk!” I love this girl. Who do I talk to about getting her and Fabio a daytime talk show? #6: I don’t think Sash’s slip at last week’s Tribal Council is going to hurt him as much as JPro seems to think it will. But I’m dropping him in the rankings because it shows he’s capable of slipping up.
fabio . jane
#7: He voted for Brenda in the first Tribal Council and they blamed it on Kelly B. He urinated in the pool (when there were trees everywhere!) and everyone was cool with it. Forget Teflon Dan, we’re looking at Teflon Fabs.
#8: I like Jane a bunch, but that fish thing last week was just stupid. If she was caught, she’d be a goner.
holly . alina
#9: I think the merge will be fine for Holly. If I were her I’d start intentionally being terrible at immunity challenges. Then she can encourage the younger ladies to start taking out the physical threats.
#10: I never felt comfortable with the Alina/NaOnka alliance, and last week proved I was right. I think dear Alina might be in some trouble.
naonka . marty
#11: The previews show NaOnka gettin’ all Russell Hantz on the camp. In a post-Hantz world that’s a gutsy move. You think Fabio won’t suspect her immediately after sock-gate?
#12: You were my pick, Marty. I hope the idol play buys you some leverage with Team Sash, but I doubt it will.

Quick Note: Follow Gordon on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news and updates.

What Do You Think: Who has the edge heading into the merge? Was Marty’s idol move smart or stupid? Why is NaOnka ripping up the camp?

‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Episode 6 Recap: $#*! My Fabio Says

October 20, 2010

Last Week: The old vs. young twist? Gone! The Medallion of Power? Gone! Tyrone? Gone! Dan? Inexplicably still here.

39 Days, 20 People, 1 “Survivor” Blog

Here are the tribes as they currently stand…

The La Flor Tribe (wearing yellow)

  • Brenda – 27, Paddleboard Company Owner
  • Fabio – 21, Student
  • Kelly B. – 26, Medical Student
  • Kelly S. – 20, Nursing Student
  • Jane – 56, Dog Trainer
  • Jill – 43, E.R. Doctor
  • Marty – 48, Technology Executive
  • Sash – 30, Real Estate Broker

The Espada Tribe (wearing blue)

  • Alina – 23, Art Student
  • Benry – 24, Club Promoter
  • Chase – 24, Race Car Jackman/Country Singer
  • Dan – 63, Real Estate Executive
  • Holly – 44, Swim Coach
  • NaOnka – 27, P.E. Teacher
  • Yve – 41, Homemaker

We meet up with the Espadans the morning after Tribal Council and Dan is telling Holly that he’s considering calling it quits. Holly uses the lessons she learned from “Survivor” legend Jimmy Johnson to try to convince Dan to stick around.

Maybe he wouldn’t be so keen on quitting if someone hadn’t sunk his super expensive shoes.

Quick Aside: Will someone please come to my house and hide the Halloween candy?  Thank you.

Later, Yve confronts Holly about not being included in the Tyrone vote. Holly thought Yve was in an alliance with Tyrone. (If you read Tyrone’s exit interview, you know that definitely wasn’t the case.)

Meanwhile at La Flor, Marty tells us that he feels like he left a serious drama and joined “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.” I’m thinking it’s more like “Fabio and Dumber.”

Jill is very concerned with how closely knit the younger tribe is. Brenda then confirms that concern by saying it’s still young vs. old. She then corrects the confirmation of the concern and says it’s the young and Jane vs. the old. Brenda wants to pull the ol’ split vote trick the next time La Flor goes to Tribal Council to flush out Marty’s immunity idol.

Immunity Challenge: Tribal immunity is not on the line, two sweet looking La Flor and Espada-themed individual necklaces are up for grabs. That means we’re in for two Tribal Councils tonight.

In the challenge, players will race to a digging area with a paddle. With that paddle they will dig for rope hoops. Once they have the hoop on their paddle they’ll have to toss it over their shoulder and into a basket that’s attached to their backside. From there they’ll run their hoop back to the beginning and place it on a post. First person to place all three hoops on their post wins immunity. The two winners will then compete in a ring toss, the first to hit three tosses receives a feast of chicken and beef kabobs for their team.

Espada goes first and…there’s not much to describe, although watching them toss the hoops into the basket is hilarious. Holly eventually wins individual immunity. As JPro places the sword-shaped Espada immunity idol around her neck, it promptly slips down her shirt. Awkward.

The La Floricans are up next and it’s more of the same. Jill, Marty, and Kelly B. are neck and neck at the finish, with Jill eventually pulling out the win. Also, her fleur de lis-shaped necklace stays out of her shirt.

The final round can best be described as Jill and Holly throwing hoops at a set of hooks. It’s close, if not very exciting, with Jill winning it for La Flor. I can’t wait for the pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey reward challenge.

Back at La Florida, Brenda is annoyed that Jill’s immunity win has thrown off their plans. Her and BBNY (Biggest Bachelor in New York) devise a plan to split the votes between Marty and Kelly B.


Hey, nowhere in my “Survivor” recap contract does it say I have to be impartial.

Meanwhile, Marty is bragging to Fabio that he is a grand master in chess. Seriously. He tells Fabio this because he claims to have the rest of the game worked out, but he needs Fabio’s help.

Shortly afterward, Marty admits to us that he isn’t a chess grand master. Well heck, if he was fibbing he should have just told Fabio he was a former head prefect at Gryffindor.

Back at Espadakota, Holly’s trying to figure out where Dan stands. Dan isn’t concerned about staying in the game because he already owns a Range Rover and a Ferrari. I’m starting to feel less bad about the destruction of his $1,600 shoes.

Benry wants to keep Dan around because he knows Dan isn’t much competition. Chase agrees with Benry, then admits to us that the only person he trusts on Espada is NaOnka. Oof…that’s rough.

NaOnka wants Dan to go home because his legs are going to snap off and “He’s going to be walking on nubs.” Apparently she’s obsessed with people who don’t have legs.

Yve then digs her own grave by telling Alina and NaOnka that she can be valuable to them because of how well she knows Marty, Jill, and Jane. Yve may have meant it as “I know the dirt on them,” but that certainly isn’t how Alina took it. She thinks they’re in an alliance.

Over at La Flor, Sash takes Fabio aside to explain the split-the-vote plan. Fabio turns to Sash with a straight face and says, “Do we want to flush the idol from Marty?”

I love you, Fabio. Seriously, never change.

Later, Sash convinces Marty that they’re going to be voting for Jane. Marty agrees to go along with that plan.

Marty tells us that he’s going to sit on the idol as it would only buy him one more Tribal Council anyways.

That night at Tribal Council, the topic of Marty’s immunity idol is brought up. Marty argues that he revealed it to show what an honest game he’s been playing. Just like his days playing seeker at the Quidditch Cup.

Brenda thinks he revealed the idol so he could appear to be noble.

Probst then kind of outs the youngsters by asking if the kids will make Marty feel safe so he won’t play it and then vote him out. Marty admits that thought has crossed his mind.

Probst asks Kelly B. how comfortable she is within the tribe. She says that she feels comfortable.

JPro asks Brenda if Jane has anything to worry about. Brenda throws the chess master under the bus by saying that Jane has to worry about Jill and Marty voting her out.


Marty says Jane doesn’t have to worry about them because the two of them can’t vote her out without help from the original La Flor.

Marty then mouths to Jane to vote for Brenda.

Voting Time: Jane votes Marty and advises him to never fluff off a southern woman, Marty votes for Brenda because she’s the black widow, the king cobra, and the black mamba all rolled into one, Brenda votes for Kelly B., and the rest aren’t shown.

Probst does some solid tallying then returns. He asks if anyone wants to use the hidden immunity idol and Marty…doesn’t.

Three votes for Marty, two votes for Brenda, and three votes for Kelly B…a tie!

Tie breaking rules; Marty and Kelly B. won’t vote, everyone else votes for either Marty or Kelly B.

No votes are shown, Probst tallies yet again, and here we go. One vote for Marty, three votes Kelly B., and the sixth person voted out of “Survivor: Nicaragua” is…Kelly B.


Espada is then brought in as La Flor sits down to a delicious feast.

Probst rubs it in, asking Espada if it bothers them that La Flor gets to eat. Dan gets the line of the night saying if it isn’t a martini then it doesn’t bother him.

Yve is fighting for her life, pointing out that Dan talking about quitting is bad for the tribe’s morale. She also thinks Dan is a liability in challenges. She must be a goner.

Dan swings back, claiming that Yve is arrogant. Yve retorts by saying she isn’t always talking about her six cars like Dan does. Yeah, I’m over the $1,600 shoes.

Alina points out that it’s getting to be that part of the game where you might not want super competitive people to stick around.

Voting Time: Dan votes for Yve, Yve votes for Dan, and the rest are sacrificed in the name of creating drama.

JPro tallies for the third time in one night (a record?) and returns. One vote for Yve, one vote for Dan, two votes for Yve, and the seventh person voted out of “Survivor: Nicaragua” is…Yve.

Verdict: Kind of a dull episode until Brenda made her move at Tribal Council. I’m not sure I understand it either. If she’d kept her mouth shut, they could have hid behind the “Well, we wanted to flush your idol” excuse, but now they’ve got a ticked off pretend chess master on their hands.

Who’s Going to Win? I wonder if Brenda’s making some unnecessary moves. Maybe someone like Chase or Sash who’re more laid back are better bets.

Power Rankings Results: Team Dragon Slayer had Yve in spot 11 and Kelly B. in spot 12 for a total of 23 points. I had Yve in spot 15 and Kelly B. in spot 10 for a total of 25 points. The current score is now Team Dragon Slayer 72, Team Truth Seeker 78.

Follow me on Twitter for breaking “Survivor” news and borderline witty remarks: @gordonholmes

What Do You Think? Should Brenda have called out Marty at Tribal Council? Would you buy a book of Fabio sayings? Has Jane become your favorite player?

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