Posts Tagged ‘the miz’

WWE Superstar The Miz: “It Is ‘Christmas Bounty’ and It Is Awesome!”

December 10, 2013

"Christmas Bounty" (WWE)

Would it really be Christmas without Clark W. Griswold? Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer? Ralphie? Those iconic characters have two things in common. First, they’re loved by millions.

And second, Mike “The Miz” Mizanin could totally take ‘em in the squared circle.

I recently had a chance to speak with “The Miz” about his entry into the Yuletide-movie genre “Christmas Bounty,” how his WWE buddies feel about his softer side, and the difficulties making the transition from the ring to the big screen…

Watch “Christmas Bounty” on XFINITY On Demand

Gordon Holmes: Your character is named “Mike” in this movie. Is that some kind of typecasting?
Mike “The Miz” Mizanin: When I saw it as a script and it said, “Mikey Muscles” I said, “You do realize my name is Mike?” And they said, “You look like a Mike.” So I guess that settled it.
Holmes: How on Earth did your parents have the foresight to do that?
The Miz: When I came out of the womb, they were like, “This guy looks like a Mike.” There was no denying it.
Holmes: I think “The Miz” is catchy. Miz TV is a fun segment. But, “Mikey Muscles” has a nice ring to it too. You might want to consider bringing that into the WWE.
The Miz: Mick Foley had like three characters, why can’t I?
Holmes: It just makes smart financial sense. Foley sells three action figures, he sells three t-shirts…
The Miz: A little merchandise never hurt anybody. I’m up for it. (Laughs)

Holmes: You’re a Cleveland guy. Mikey Muscles is all about Jersey pride. Was it tough to make that transition?
The Miz: When I first saw the script I was like, “I’m not going to try a Jersey accent.” But then I thought, “You know what? I’m going to do it.” I had a voice coach, so every time before a shot I’d go and talk to that person. As I was up there in Vancouver I eventually started talking in a Jersey accent the entire time. It just got so catchy. And I love New Jersey. They have like their own little gimmick. You’ve got to love it. You’ve got to respect it.  It was fun to play.

Holmes: What’s the reaction been like from the WWE Superstars and Divas?
The Miz: We’re always about ribbing each other. There’s a whole lot of love. I get a lot of past/present/future references because that was one of Mikey Muscles’ romantic moments. And whenever a guy’s giving his softer, more sensitive side they’re going to make fun of it. Everyone’s been pretty cool about it.
Holmes: You, John Cena, Randy Orton, Kane, and others are all doing movies now. Is there any competition between you guys?
The Miz: WWE is all about competition. Everyone wants to have the most sales, the most trending topics on Twitter, the most media.

Holmes: What are some of your favorite Christmas movies?
The Miz: Dude, luckily WWE Studios and ABC Family got together and we got to see a preview of the “25 Days of Christmas.” I’m a huge fan of that whole event. I was watching it yesterday and I saw my favorite Christmas movie of all time, you’d think it’s “A Christmas Story” because I’m from Cleveland.
Holmes: Right?
The Miz: No, my favorite Christmas movie is “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.” No one beats Uncle Eddie. It’s the best.
Holmes: Those are both solid choices. But what happens when Mikey Muscles goes toe-to-toe with Ralphie from “The Christmas Story”? We’ll even let Ralphie bring his Red Ryder b-b gun.
The Miz: Listen, you can bring your little b-b gun. The fact is, the bb gun isn’t going to poke your eye out, The Miz is going to poke your eye out with a Skull-Crushing Finale.
Holmes: What about against Clark W. Griswold? We’ll let him bring the Family Truckster.
The Miz: He can bring the dog, the squirrel… You know, the promo that he cut on his boss? That’d better be the promo he cuts on me. He’s going to need it. I’ll put him in a figure four and make him tap, tap, tap.
Holmes: Like when Bing Crosby danced with Danny Kaye. Alright, Buddy the Elf?
The Miz: Who’s that?
Holmes: Buddy the Elf? From “Elf”? He’s got the kind of attire you might see in a wrestling ring.
The Miz: Buddy is such a nice, warm, wonderful character. He tries to bring goodness and positivity to everything. I don’t think he’d actually go up against me, he’d con me into tag teaming so he could win and be the good guy.

Holmes: You got your start in reality TV with “The Real World,” then you became a WWE Superstar, now you’re making movies. These are three very different forms of entertainment with their own intricacies. You’re a bit of a Renaissance Miz. What’ve have been some of the challenges and difficulties as you’ve switched genres?
The Miz: I think the biggest and hardest thing to do is get respect. When you come from a reality show, that’s what you’re supposed to do. Just do reality. Sit your life in front of a camera. That’s it. You have no talent. But, I wanted more. When I went to WWE I was frowned upon by the WWE Universe, the locker room. Nobody wanted me to succeed. I worked hard at it, I dedicated myself, and now eight years later I can say I’ve had a successful run in the WWE. And now moving into movies it’s another transition. “He’s just a WWE Superstar.” I feel like we don’t get the respect we deserve. WWE is theater. We’re in front of a live audience and you have one take to get it right. We have these amazing storylines. It’s very much like movies except we don’t get 100 takes. I think people are going to say, “Oh, it’s just a wrestler.” But, I think we’re going to turn some heads.

Holmes: The Christmas season is underway. There’s a ton of competition as far as entertainment goes. Why should someone plop down and watch “Christmas Bounty”?
The Miz: Whether you are a small child, a mother, a father, a young adult, a hipster…if you like action, if you like drama, if you like comedy…if you like fight scenes, if you like holidays and Christmas…there is only one movie you need to see and that is “Christmas Bounty.” Get in on DVD or Blu-Ray exclusively at Wal-Mart. You can also get it on iTunes. I’m telling you, you will not be disappointed. You will laugh, you will cry. At the end of the day you can sit down with your family, drink your egg nog, have your Christmas tree all lit up. Put on some nice warm socks and watch it on TV. You’ll be laughing and smiling at the end and you’ll have an amazing holiday.
Holmes: And is there any one adjective that can describe “Christmas Bounty”?
The Miz: It is “Christmas Bounty” and it is…Aweeeeeesoooooooome!

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

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WWE Superstar The Miz Breaks Down SummerSlam’s Big Main Events

August 2, 2013

The Miz (WWE)

For the first time ever, WWE’s SummerSlam will have a host. And that host is…awesooooooome!

I spoke with the Miz at this year’s San Diego Comic Con. While there we discussed Summerslam’s two huge main events, we were interrupted by a WWE Hall of Famer, and we did our best to annoy Dolph Ziggler…

The Miz: (While holding a Miz Rumbler figure that was made especially for San Diego Comic Con) Look at this guy. Only ten thousand made. A limited edition.
Gordon Holmes: Uncanny. Is this your first Comic Con?
The Miz: No, I’ve been to Comic Con quite a bit. My favorite story from Comic Con is I was doing an autograph signing a couple of years ago and Transformers was huge that year. Everyone was dressed as Transformers. And I see this guy and I point him out to a kid and I say, “Oh look! It’s Optimus Prime!” And the kids says, “That’s not Optimus Prime, you idiot! That’s Voltron.” So, I was schooled by a five-year old.

Holmes: Comic Con is known for its extravagant cosplayers. Is there any particular character you’re hoping to see? Perhaps of the female persuasion?
The Miz: Oh man, I always liked Jessica Rabbit. I was a huge Roger Rabbit fan as a kid, and then growing up into a man I realized how lucky Roger Rabbit really was. I think a lot of people like Ariel as well.
Holmes: A bit of a Harley Quinn man myself.
Mick Foley: May I interject?
The Miz: Absolutely.
Foley:  This is Mick Foley, WWE Hall of Famer. Miz, I concur.
The Miz: Thank you!
Foley: After three rides of the Roger Rabbit ride at Disneyland I found that I had a very real crush on Jessica Rabbit. It happens.
The Miz: If only she was real.

Holmes: Speaking of life-like representations, we’re here at the Mattel booth, what’s it like the first time someone hands you an action figure that looks just like you?
The Miz: As a kid I had all the WWE action figures. You name it, I had it. I had a wrestling ring that I would fling them out of. And now that I have these amazing action figures that are so detailed and so great, it’s surreal. I have like 50 action figures, and I have each one of them. I show them off to my friends when they come to my house. Whenever they say something to me and I don’t have a comeback I say, “Do you have an action figure?”

Holmes: SummerSlam is shaping up to be a good one.
The Miz: SummerSlam is the biggest event of the summer. One thing’s for sure is people are going to be talking about the Miz. You’ve got Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena for the WWE Championship. That’s going to be something to remember.
Holmes: Who do you like in the Cena/Bryan match?
The Miz: I’ve been in the ring with both of them. I have trained Daniel Bryan, basically, to be the superstar he is today. If you watched NXT he was my rookie. I take full credit for all of his success. And John Cena I defeated at Wrestlemania 27 in the main event. One of my most memorable matches. I know that Cena doesn’t quit, he doesn’t tap out. One of Bryan’s main moves is a tap-out move. I’ve never seen Cena tap out of anything. So, I’ve got to lean toward the WWE Champion.
Holmes: That’s interesting as I’ve noticed you’ve made the switch to a tap-out hold in the figure-four leglock.
The Miz: All the superstars want to use that, but I’m the only one that can actually tap people out with it.

Note: At this point in the interview Dolph Ziggler wanders over to where we are speaking.

Holmes: I heard a rumor that Dolph Ziggler was interested in that hold.
The Miz: He wished that he could put on the figure-four leglock as good as I can and as fast as I can. It just so happens that nobody can. It’s just one of those things.
Foley: Miz, can I interject again?
The Miz: Absolutely.
Foley: This is 2013 WWE Hall of Famer Mick Foley again, I believe I only tapped twice in my career, but if I could go back in time, I would’ve tapped almost instantly to Miz’s version of the figure-four leglock.
The Miz: Thank you very much, Mick! Not Dolph Ziggler, right? The Miz!
Foley: And without any shame whatsoever. There’s no shame in tapping to Miz’s figure four.
Holmes: Dolph Ziggler’s is like a scalpel. Yours is more like a chainsaw.
The Miz: Exactly! His is like a thumbnail and mine is like an axe.

Note: Having had enough of our antics, Dolph Ziggler stood and walked away.

Holmes: Who are you picking in the CM Punk/Lesnar match?
The Miz: I know how Punk is and Punk finds a way to win no matter how big a person is. He finds a way. He calls himself “The Best in the World.” Granted, every WWE Superstar will say that, but he believes that. Brock has something coming to him, but man, Brock is a beast. I’ve been in the ring with him and this guy has power like I’ve never seen before. He has been defeated before, so there’s a way. I think Punk can find that way.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

Watch “WWE: Summerslam,” Sunday, August 18, 2013 at 8 pm ET on Pay Per View.

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WWE Superstar The Miz Is Ready to (Royal) Rumble This Sunday

January 24, 2013

The Miz (WWE)

Every teenager who puts on pancake makeup in their high school production of “Oklahoma” dreams of Broadway. Every youngster who hits a seeing-eye single in little league dreams of the World Series. And, every kid who plops a toy championship belt over their shoulder dreams of Wrestlemania.

There are two differences between those people and The Miz. The Miz did it in front of everyone on MTV’s “The Real World” and he made his Wrestlemania dreams a reality. And if the aaaaawesome one has his way, this Sunday’s Royal Rumble will be his ticket back to sports entertainment’s grandest stage.

I spoke with the WWE’s “Must-See” Superstar in the days leading up to the Royal Rumble and had a chance to learn about his new relationship with Ric Flair, his picks and strategies for this Sunday’s show, and how he went from underdog to top dog…

Order WWE: Royal Rumble Today

Gordon Holmes: Good morning, Miz. How’s it going?
The Miz: I’m in Los Angeles, California getting ready for the Royal Rumble.
Holmes: Los Angeles? I’m in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania freezing my butt off.
The Miz: It’s 75 and sunny here, so I’m feeling pretty great about myself. I might go take a swim in my pool.
Holmes: You are the worst human being in the whole world.
The Miz: (Laughs)  I am.
Holmes: Not only that, but I was on hold and I expected the WWE’s conference call system to have some kind of cool Superstar theme music. Instead it was a weird muzak.
The Miz: Really? When they put me on hold for you it’s always some kind of WWE entrance theme.
Holmes: That’s unfair.
The Miz: I had to sit through Alicia Fox’s entrance music.
Holmes: Well, this leads to an important question, I didn’t want to lead off with it, but do you have the best entrance music?
The Miz: I will say I have one of the best entrance themes in all of WWE. I won’t say the best of all time because my favorite is The Brood. They didn’t even have words, and they didn’t need words. They had the best entrance as well coming up through the fire was just awesome.
Holmes: Nobody’s using that right now, can you swipe that entrance for Wrestlemania?
The Miz: Nope, that’s theirs. I’ll let them keep it. I’ll keep my marshmallow blow-up “Awesome.”
Holmes: Don’t bash the “Awesome” bounce house. That was cool.
The Miz: My friends all made fun of me when I first got them. They said, “Everyone gets this cool pyro. The Undertaker has the lights go out and fog. Then you come out with these blow-up marshmallows. Congratulations, you’ve really made it.” I’m like, “Thanks, guys. Thanks, buddies.”
Holmes: The “Awesome” balloons aren’t free. Someone put some money and thought into it.
The Miz: Right? Kids love it.

Holmes: Alright, this Sunday at the Royal Rumble, correct me if I’m wrong, but this is what I assume is going to happen; The Miz defeats Antonio Cesaro for the WWE United States Championship in the Internet show, then goes on to win the 30-man Royal Rumble.
The Miz: That’s exactly what I’m going to do. This is what’s going to happen, the pre-show I’m going to take the United States Championship from Antonio Cesaro, making it the most-watched pre-show ever. Then I’m going to go on to the Royal Rumble, and it’s going to be the most talked about Royal Rumble in WWE history as well because I’m going to win as the United States Champion. Then I’m going to go on to main event Wrestlemania and it’s going to be the most-watched Wrestlemania, not because of the Rock, not because of whoever else, not CM Punk, not John Cena, but The Miz. I’m going to be a multi-champion. It’s going to be awesome.
Holmes: This isn’t your first Rumble. What kind of things do you do to prepare yourself?
The Miz: A lot of cardio. Running, jump rope, any kind of thing that gets your heart going really fast. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon. I was in that ring for 45 minutes last year. I was the first entrant, which is the unluckiest number out of them all. Not only does it take cardio, but it takes luck, it takes ability, it takes strength. One unlucky thing, one slip and you’re done. The best thing you can do is stay under the radar and hope nobody comes after you. If you’re Ryback or John Cena and you’re the favorite to win, guess who everyone is targeting?

Holmes: As the Royal Rumble winner you get to choose which champion you face. Have you given thought as to who you’re going to target?
The Miz: At this point, you never know who’s going to be the champion at the time. You’ve got CM Punk going against the Rock at the Royal Rumble. And, if the Shield is involved in this match, CM Punk will get striped of the title. That’ll be interesting to watch on its own. Then you have the World Heavyweight Championship where it’s the Big Show versus Alberto Del Rio, nobody wants to go up against a seven-foot tall, 450-pound man at Wrestlemania in the main event. So, it all depends on who’s going to be the champion at the time.
Holmes: You’re one of only three guys that has had a recent match with the Rock and CM Punk. Who do you like in that bout?
The Miz: Here’s the way I look at it; if I win the Royal Rumble, CM Punk…
Holmes: Whoa…if you win the Rumble?
The Miz: When I win the Royal Rumble I will have the choice between the WWE Championship and the World Heavyweight Championship. So, you look at it and you go, CM Punk vs. the Rock. CM Punk has held the title for 400-something days. He’s a proven champion and he’ll do whatever it takes to win that title at all costs. Then you have the Rock coming back, hasn’t been in the ring in almost a year now. CM Punk has been defending the championship for the past year. He’s crisp, he’s in his prime. The Rock might have a little ring rust. But, I want the Rock to win. The Rock is the reason I wanted to become a WWE Superstar. I would like to face the Rock in the main event of Wrestlemania, beat him, then solidify myself as the most must-see WWE Superstar of all time.
Holmes: You wrestled the Rock in his first match back at the 2011 Survivor Series. Was there any ring rust? Has he missed a step?
The Miz: Not that day. You heard the sold-out Madison Square Garden chanting at him, “You’ve still got it.” He definitely still had it then, but remember, that was a year and a half ago. A lot of things happen in a year and a half.  Obviously, he’s training and getting ready, but it’ll be interesting to see what happens.

Holmes: Alright, true confession time. A lot of people, and I include myself in this, were rooting against you. By that I mean, here’s this kid who gets some fame from “The Real World.” He wants to be a WWE Superstar, but does he appreciate what it really takes to make it? A lot of people would use that modicum of notoriety to get their foot in the door, but then wouldn’t have the work ethic to do anything beyond that. So, add me to the list of people who were wrong about you.
The Miz: Oh! Are you one of the naysayers?
Holmes: Yes, I was one to say “nay.” Did we help drive you?
The Miz: My entire life it’s been like, “You can’t do this, you can’t do that.” And, those are the people that motivated me to be the person I am today.  When I was trying out for “The Real World” people told me I wouldn’t make it because there’s 40,000 people trying out. What makes me stand out? And once I started trying out and they saw me be successful, all my friends tried out the next year. And when I tried to be a WWE Superstar there was, “You’re not big enough. You’re not athletic enough. There’s no way.” And, I went in and said, “Yes I am.” And once I got to the WWE, people said, “You’re never going to be a success. You’ll be fired in three months.” Everyone wanted me gone. I was kicked out of the locker room, everyone hated me. But I kept a positive head on my shoulders and kept working hard. Harder than everyone else. Anytime there was media, interviews, I was on it. I wanted it more than everyone else. That’s my workman’s mentality and it worked in the end.
Holmes: The confession I just gave you, have you heard similar confessions from other people in the industry?
The Miz: I don’t think people like to confess that kind of thing. Most people like to be right.
Holmes: I like to be right too, but I can admit when I was wrong.
The Miz: I guess the only one that comes to mind was when I was on “The Real World,” I asked an executive producer, “Why did you pick me?” And he said, “I didn’t pick you. I was outvoted. I thought you were a buckethead. I couldn’t stand you.” He called me a buckethead!
Holmes: I was going to say, “What’s a buckethead?”
The Miz: He said I was a buckethead. But he said, “As the season progressed, not only did I like you, but you became my favorite. So, I was proven wrong.”

Holmes: You’re starting to be cheered now.
The Miz: It’s weird, isn’t it?
Holmes: It is weird. Have you had to make any tweaks in this new role?
The Miz: I’d say it’s the same exact role I’ve played my entire career. I’m still the cocky, arrogant, egotistical Superstar. Now, I’m just their cocky, egotistical Superstar. I’m the guy who calls it like it is. Have I changed at all? No. It’s just the people that are coming up to me now are the people that most people hate. I’ve always been a person that what you give to me, I will give you right back. So, if you boo me? Guess what? I’m going to make you boo me even more. If you cheer me I’m going to try to make you cheer for me even more.

Holmes: You’re starring in a movie, “The Marine 3: Homefront.” Now, you’re the Marine and some guys have got your niece?
The Miz: My sister.
Holmes: Gotcha. My question is; why do these guys keep messing with these Marines?!
The Miz: (Laughs) I don’t know.
Holmes: It never turns out well for them.
The Miz: You’d think these people would get it. Alright, this guy’s a Marine, I can’t mess with him. But, they keep doing it. You don’t want to mess with a Marine, that’s number one.
Holmes: The WWE does a lot for the military with the Tribute to the Troops shows. Has there been any feedback about the movie?
The Miz: They’re always incredible. This year I went to Bahrain. Myself, Vince McMahon, R Truth, Layla, and Eve all got to see what our Navy does. And let me tell you, these sailors are incredible. I asked one guy why he wanted to be in the Navy. And he told me, “The reason I wanted to be in the Navy was because I was working at Lids, you know, that hat place, and I was having a daughter, and I wanted her to be proud of me.” And the thing is, he doesn’t get to see her often, but he knows he’s paving the way for her to have a great life. And I thought that was amazing. These guys sacrifice so much for our freedom. And I hope that I make every Marine proud with “The Marine 3: Homefront.” And I think I will. I’ve seen the movie and I was like, “Wow, this is incredible.” And normally I’m very critical of everything I do. But, this is something I’m very proud of.

Holmes: If Must-See Miz could go back and give some advice to “Real World” Miz, what would it be?
The Miz: I would tell him to do exactly what you’re doing, because whatever it is, you’re doing it right.
Holmes: It’s like “Back to the Future” and you’re afraid too much information about the future will screw him up.
The Miz: If I change one little small thing, something might change. And right now I really love my life. I love the memories I’ve had since “The Real World.”
Holmes: What’s the best advice you received when you were coming up?
The Miz: Probably from Billy Kidman back when I wasn’t in the WWE. I was actually at a Playboy party and he was there for Torrie Wilson’s cover. His best advice was, “Stick with it.” And it sounds so simple, so stupid, but so many times people find excuses to not fulfill their dreams.

Holmes: As far as your proudest moments in the WWE, was it winning the WWE Title from Randy Orton or participating in a “Woo” off with Ric Flair?
The Miz: (Laughs) You know, you really can’t beat having a “Woo” off with the legend Ric Flair. Not only that, but to have Ric Flair allow me to apply the figure four, it’s almost like…I hate to say a passing of a torch, but I felt so honored. To sit there and talk to Ric Flair on Miz TV and not only strut like Ric and “Woo” like Ric, but to have the honor of putting on the figure four and now using the figure four is just an incredible feat.
Holmes: Did he give you any figure-four pointers?
The Miz: Well, if you watched Raw I had trouble putting it on Dolph Ziggler due to Beat the Clock. Now I’ve been watching tapes of Ric Flair to make sure I never have problems again.
Holmes: In your defense, Ric Flair has been using that moves for decades.
The Miz: I agree. He’s been doing it for thirty years, I’ve been doing it for two weeks. I’ll take my faults, but the Twitter universe was on me. Man, they were killing me.
Holmes: Whoa…hold the phone. You’re trying to tell me the Internet was negative about something?
The Miz: (Laughs) I know, right? You take it with a grain of salt, then perform as best you can the next time out.

Don’t miss WWE: Royal Rumble this Sunday, January 27, 2013 at 8 p.m. ET on Pay Per View.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

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‘WWE Extreme Rules’ Results

May 2, 2011

Hope you’re ready for some Wrestlemania leftovers! We are live and in high definition from Tampa, Florida. Our hosts for the evening are Josh Matthews, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T.

Last Man Standing Match: CM Punk wasn’t able to answer the ten count after Randy Orton and his five o’clock shadow gave him an RKO off of the top rope.

Wait, is Orton’s five o’clock shadow ripping off Kurt Angle? Uh oh…

Before the match, the anonymous Raw General Manager banned the New (and not terribly improved) Nexus from ringside, thus robbing Randy of the opportunity to single-handedly wipe them all out again. Kendo sticks were the flavor of the match with both guys taking some violent shots. Other highlights included Punk side-Russian leg sweeping Orton onto a steel chair, Orton RKOing Punk onto the announcer’s table (which didn’t break), and Punk giving Orton the GTS onto the steel ring steps. Overall a decent match, but the crowd didn’t seem that into it.

Afterward, Teddy Long, (Holla!) told Sheamus that he’d be defending (and I assume losing) his U.S. championship against Kofi Kingston in a table match. Sheamus isn’t cool with this as he doesn’t think Kofi is from the United States. He wants to see Kofi’s birth certificate. Well, Sheamus’s hair is as ridiculous as Donald Trump’s.

Table Match for the United States Championship: Kofi won the United States championship after putting Sheamus through a table with a boom drop off of the top rope. It felt something was off with the color on my TV as I’m not used to seeing Sheamus wearing red, white, and blue, and Kofi looked like a pack of Hubba Bubba with his hot pink/florescent green attire.

Wait, are Sheamus’s USA colors ripping off Kurt Angle? Uh oh…

Some cool stuff included Kofi doing a double foot stomp onto Sheamus’s chest, Kofi managing to keep himself from going through a table by straddling it, and the final boom drop off of the top rope to the floor was pretty awesome. But again, a decent match with a silent crowd. Weird.

After the match, R-Truth visited Todd Grisham to let him (and us) know how he feels about being pushed out of the main event. As you’d imagine, he’s not happy about it. He thinks it’s a conspiracy. He tries to spell conspiracy, but only gets halfway through before deciding to move on.

Tag Team Country Whipping Match: Michael Cole and Jack Swagger won after Cole was able to schoolboy Jim Ross. Michael Cole wore bubble wrap at the beginning of the match in an obvious nod to The Cat. (Yes, I’m aware that that joke dates me.) That didn’t last long though as Jerry Lawler quickly ripped it off of him. The story of the match revolved around Lawler and Ross trying to get their hands on Cole, but Swagger kept cutting them off. When Ross was eventually able to get ahold of Cole, what followed was pretty brutal.

Oh, that’s brutal as in sloppy, not as in violent.

This whole match was a bit of a trainwreck, and with Cole winning, sadly I think we’re in for more of this feud.

Note: WWE has a history of making matches with non-wrestlers entertaining, this just isn’t one of those times.

Next up Jonathan Cena had some interview time. He let us know that his long 10-month title drought ends tonight.

Falls Count Anywhere Match: Rey Mysterio defeated Cody Rhodes with a  springboard splash after a 619. Before the match, Cody Rhodes had his representatives hand out paper bags to the uglier members of the audience. This bout went everywhere like an old-school Hardcore match. At one point they even ended up in a concession stand. Cool moments included Rey dropping the dime off of the rampway, Cody wheelbarrowing Mysterio onto the steel steps, and Mysterio spraying Cody with a Great Muta-esque mist. Pretty good match and the crowd seemed into it. One odd thing though, what’s the point of a falls-count-anywhere match where the fall takes place in the ring?

Afterward, Layla apologized to the other Divas for being rude to them. The Divas forgave her because for as much as they don’t like Layla, they like Michelle McCool much less.

Loser Leaves WWE Match: Lay-Cool explodes, brother! Why isn’t this the main event? It was the main event when Shawn Michaels retired!

Anywho, Layla won the match after reversing a pin out of the Faith Breaker. Not much to call attention to here. I guess the best thing I can say about it is it was way better than any match involving Michael Cole and Jim Ross.

When it was over, Kharma (who for those of you who are unfamiliar with the former Awesome Kong should know is HUGE) destroyed McCool with a double-underhook face breaker.

Next up, Alberto Del Rio is giving his personal ring announcer some tips on how to announce him as the new champion.

Ladder Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Christian claimed his first World title after Edge drove into the arena in a jeep and distracted Alberto Del Rio. At one point it looked like Christian was on his way to victory, but Brodus Clay snuck in and swiped the ladder out from under him. Big moments included Christian being pushed off of the top rope, landing on a standing ladder on the outside and hitting Del Rio with a crossbody, Del Rio hitting an armbreaker off of a tiny Hornswoggle-esque ladder, Christian hitting a spear in honor of his buddy Edge, and Del Rio nearly killing himself by missing a legdrop off of the top rope and through a ladder. Really good match, and the crowd really heated up toward the end.

After that we meet up with The Miz and Alex Riley. Alex is annoyed that the numbers are against The Miz in his Triple Threat Cage Match. The Miz isn’t interested in what Riley has to say. That makes two of us.

Lumberjack Match for the WWE Tag Team Championship: Kane and the Big Show defeated Wade Barrett and Ezekiel Jackson after Wade Barrett tagged himself into the match and ate a Show chokeslam. Not much to call home about here in this very short match, but it was impressive to see Ezekiel Jackson bodyslam the Big Show.

Triple Threat Steel Cage Match for the WWE Championship: John Cena won his 53rd World Championship by pinning The Miz after an Attitude Adjustment off of the top rope. At one point R-Truth interjected himself into the match, keeping John Morrison from escaping the cage. He also hit Cena with an axe kick. Memorable moments included Morrison and Cena (Johnx2) suplexing Miz off of the cage, Morrison hitting a C4 on Cena, and Morrison hitting a Starship Pain from off of the top of the cage. Decent match here, but I’m sorry if seeing Cena with the belt for the 10th time doesn’t inspire much interest from me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a Cena hater, but after he lost it the last time, he didn’t seem that concerned. So, why should I care when he gets it back?

Final Thoughts: The show boasted some really solid matches that may have been held back by a quiet crowd. And, what was bad was relatively short. Worth checking it out on a replay if you get the chance.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

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